How to Make (or Ruin) a Client's Day /  by Alexander Lyadov

As soon as I hopped into a Bolt taxi, the driver had a quibble with me. He was like, "Why didn't I close the door right away, when he had the AC on?" By his logic, the customer shouldn't worry about their own business or destination, but about the condition of someone else's car. Such little things reveal a person who is not in their rightful place. In the service game, especially without a standout feature, the key is to meet the customer's basic expectations without causing any hassle. The goal is simple: safely take them from point A to point B. Making a taxi customer happy is tough, but there are plenty of ways to ruin their day. Like breaking traffic rules, blasting music, dumping your problems on them, smoking or swearing at everyone and everything.

The day before, we dropped by a regular branch of PrivatBank, where they treated us like family. The branch boss and two managers fixed all our issues as smoothly and swiftly as a pit stop team changes tires on a Formula-1 car. We smiled the whole day from this rare combination of humanity and professionalism. All three bank employees were clearly in the right place. There is no doubt that helping strangers brought them meaning and joy.

To succeed in the service business, you need one of two things:

  1. Either become a unique expert in a narrow field,

  2. Or genuinely value relationships and love people.

In the first case, your skill generates such massive value that customers are willing to forgive you for almost anything. In the second case, instead of a banal service, the customer leaves with a gift: "I'm Human. I'm valuable. I'm not alone."

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Intertwining of Souls /  by Alexander Lyadov

Year 2003

My wife Marina flew to Ukraine from England for a few days. Since the beginning of the war, we hadn't seen each other for a year and five months. The day before our reunion, someone warned us that we should be ready, that everything might turn out differently, not the way it used to be. And supposedly, we might need to almost reacquaint ourselves and get used to each other. Of course, our meeting was emotional. However, I didn't find any changes in the quality of our relationship. Rather, I see even more sincerity, tolerance, and warmth. Why?

I strongly believe that if there's a true connection between people, the method and frequency of communication don't matter. My wife and I, for instance, talk or text almost every day. In 1991, when I was a student, I went abroad to work, far from home. Messengers didn't exist back then, so we simply sent letters more often. I remember how much care and warmth those letters carried. By the way, during university, some people whispered that even though we studied together, our paths would surely diverge after graduation. Well, over 30 years have passed, and we're still together just the same.

We argue regularly, say hurtful things, and sulk for hours afterwards. But there's something more important, something that makes us want to smooth out all those wrinkles. It's as if we sometimes deviate from our shared path, which isn't always easy but definitely better than the impassable thicket on either side. Honestly, I have no thoughts on how long this trail will wind and where it will lead us. But I feel an indescribable gratitude that our souls are intertwined, even when thousands of kilometers separate us.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Manage the Distance /  by Alexander Lyadov

When it comes to solving problems, choosing the right distance is key. This insight repeatedly surfaced during my explorations across various disciplines, including business mediation, the therapeutic technique of 'Focusing,' and Vipassana meditation. Essentially, one needs to reprogram his or her brain. Natural reactions don't help; they worsen the situation.

What do people usually do when they're stuck in a tough spot? One may charge the problem with clenched fists, another freezes, and a third rushes away. Alas, when you're faced with something completely unfamiliar, any knee-jerk reaction is your foe. Default behavior is only valuable for ordinary tasks. But when the nature of the phenomenon is unclear, its danger can be either tiny or immense.

The most sensible approach in such cases is to understand precisely what you're dealing with. To achieve this, you must thoroughly examine the phenomenon from all angles. Hence, the critical importance of choosing the right distance. Move too far away, and the flow of information vanishes. Get too close, and fear compels a reactive response. A Vipassana meditator learns to maintain equanimity, calmly observing uncomfortable sensations and thoughts. A professional business mediator must remain composed amidst intense corporate conflicts. A focuser knows that the problem itself points the way to a solution, provided you genuinely spend time alongside it.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Tell Me More /  by Alexander Lyadov

Unknown photographer

 

Recently in a therapy group, I had a real eye-opener. They showed us this music video with a mix of drama and comedy at the end. We talked about the emotions it stirred up and who emphasized what. Then, we each described what we thought the plot was about. That's when it hit me: it was like we watched three very different stories. And keep in mind, these are experienced participants who've spent quite a bit of time together, all while sharing a common culture. I pondered, "What about interactions among strangers? Particularly those from varying backgrounds? Isn't it a marvel that they can actually communicate and collaborate at all?"

The goal of this group is simple: to know oneself and others better. So, everyone tries to honestly share their feelings, actions, and thoughts. This is the rare opportunity for some not-so-comfortable yet safe feedback. Manipulation, finger-pointing, and self-deception – those behaviors aren't welcomed here. This is exactly why we've come to realize how our personal perspectives can distort reality. Amidst a sea of information, we selectively pick what aligns with our own narrative. This is why the most impassioned (and often fruitless) debates arise when we're confined within our own narrative, disregarding alternative ways of perceiving the world.

Further analysis revealed that our interpretations aren't arbitrary. Your psychological inclinations, upbringing, and past experiences guide you to observe A, skew B, and dismiss C. So, what's the solution? Consider the notion that your interpretation of an event isn't the sole one. Then, fueled by authentic curiosity, inquire of your companion, "Hey, can you dive deeper into why you see it that way?"

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Balancing Act /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

"Only perform these exercises for the injured leg. We need to make it significantly stronger than the healthy one," instructs the rehab specialist. "But why?" I wonder, "Won't that create an imbalance?" It turns out, the body remembers the injury and will try to protect the knee by taking weight off of it. But when the ligaments and muscles not only recover, but also gain extra strength and resilience, the body stops worrying about what might happen next.

Essentially, the pendulum must swing from one extreme to another. Otherwise, lost balance cannot be regained. This thought seems obvious, but... The mind seems to protest: "Why create excess? Why not simply eliminate the deficit?" Unfortunately, to go from a negative to zero, you'll have to go through a positive. Opposites, like a hero and a villain, cannot exist without each other. Wherever there's an imbalance, drama arises.

I read somewhere that ancient Chinese healers focused solely on restoring their patients' energy balance. Back then, I remember scoffing at this as esoteric. But the longer I observe the work of masters in various fields, the more inclined I am to agree that it's indeed true. Whether it's rehabilitation, business mediation, or psychotherapy, it doesn't matter. Want to eliminate negative symptoms in a company or an individual? Look for where the imbalance lies."

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Illusion's Danger /  by Alexander Lyadov

When your knee's a real mess, you handle it with care. Slippery ice? Stay indoors. Hiking? No way. Sports championship? Maybe next year. Instead of chasing records and limits, your first job is to heal.

Similarly, when one's vulnerability lies in one's psyche and mind. Back in the day, folks hit college for a taste of freedom, new horizons, and mind-blowing stuff. Nowadays, universities are more like nurseries, where bearded "babies" get coddled to avoid discomfort. Instead of growing, young minds shrink. As adaptability wanes, a harsh reality check is inevitable. Feeling it, fragile souls hide in their made-up worlds.

If you're building a biz, fighting fires, or lost in a wild forest, nothing's riskier than delusions. Even if your brain resists, your inner self knows your weak spots. It'll do all to keep out "dangerous" facts. It might even erase the fact and its teller. Later, you'll ask, "Why did I snap? What hit me?" But distorting reality's as silly as spitting the wind, let alone acid splashes. Sooner or later, illusions will smack your biz and life. That's why true entrepreneurs never lie to themselves.

So, do you have a ritual for shaking off illusions?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Unknown Beast /  by Alexander Lyadov

Knowing your superpower is crucial for achieving more with less effort. When you're engrossed in what comes naturally to you, the work practically handles itself. People gaze at you in awe and ask, "Why does this come so easily to you?" Your response is a smile and, "Is this even work? I enjoy it so much that I'd do it non-stop even without rewards." As investor Navall Ravikant once said, "Do what feels like play to you, but looks like work to others".

Yet, there's something even more critical than your superpower. It's about your vulnerability point, your kryptonite or Achilles' heel. Because any strength loses its meaning if a single blow of fate hits your pain point and brings you down. And fate will strike, rest assured. But the worst is if that fateful blow catches you off guard.

The sole way to prevent a catastrophe is to understand yourself. Specifically, to explore the part of you that remains unknown. Some aspects of your personality you may admire and take pride in. But your other aspects or parts trigger embarrassment, irritation, disgust, fear, or shame. As long as this part remains detached, it will act on its own. Mostly, it lurks in the shadows. Yet at times, it surprises you with its behavior, like a wild beast. Studying the behavior of this "beast" allows you to comprehend its motivations. At the very least, you can adapt and counteract its negative effects. But perhaps this beast will prove irreplaceable in situations A, B and C. Maybe, one day, you'll wholeheartedly embrace and love every aspect of yourself.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Truth vs Lie /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

We fear the truth. It shatters the illusions we hold dear. Losing them means losing our familiar self-image. The more lies in the foundation of our world, the more anxious we live. Everything and everyone around us can become a personal threat. This shows up in excessive emotions over trivial matters. Or in completely ignoring what we thought we couldn't miss. We glorify the power of our mind, but it turns out to be a subconscious captive. So, it twists and turns like a snake when reality grabs us by the tail.

The paradox is that truth, though seemingly perilous, offers salvation. Unlike the instability of illusion, we feel truth as solid ground beneath us. You've experienced the sudden crystallization of truth at least once in your life — a moment recognizable by its profound clarity, unwavering resolve, and inner peace. Though a minute earlier, you were struggling in waves of doubts and fears. The transformation is so profound that you want to stay forever in this blissful state.

Through individual and group psychotherapy, I observe the struggle between truth and lies. In business therapy with entrepreneurs, I glean insights into how this battle unfolds in others. Personal intricacies reveal depth. The cases of others offer breadth and a variety of self-deception methods. Then, I can make sense of the acquired experience through workshops and books. That's why I love my job. It's a rare opportunity to see reality as it is.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Liberate Your Words /  by Alexander Lyadov

There's this program called "Hemingway Editor." As is known, the writer's style was all about being concise, rich, and truthful. So, you copy your text into the program to check it. The editor highlights in different colours everything that the eye stumbles over. For example, complex sentences, extra words, and passive phrases. It's always tough for authors to cut through their own text, where every word feels valuable. But when a section is critically highlighted, you can't brush off that fact. You start simplifying, and reading the text becomes easier.

But sometimes, I resist this kind of correction. "What nonsense are you talking about?" I say to the editor. "Sure, the sentence is long, but it's beautiful." Or it insists on deleting supposedly unnecessary words, while I see it as the full-bodied text turning into a skeleton.

And then it struck me: "Let's see how you rate the work of the maestro himself." I took a passage from the story "The Old Man and the Sea." And what do you think? The "Hemingway Editor" tore Ernest Hemingway apart. The writer wasn't good enough for a critic who thought he knew the true style of the writer. Of course, this doesn't mean the program is useless. But it's important to remember that it's just a tool, with its function and limits of use. Yet, no tool can replace the Creator's judgment. Only he can decide what's fitting and what's not, what to get rid of and what to keep. Why? For the implicit, what the author seeks to express, always transcends explicit concepts and doctrines. That's why the author has the right, even the obligation, to break any rules that he himself or someone else turned into law. Because a creative person is born to be free.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Coaching Bliss /  by Alexander Lyadov

"Is it done? 600?" the sports rehabilitator asked. The conversation took place a month after my meniscus surgery.

"Done. I did 700 squats instead of 600," I reported." I reported. I noticed astonishment and satisfaction in his eyes. After the workout, I inquired about weekend homework. To my surprise, the rehabilitator said, "Take two days off."

As a business therapist, I understand him well. It's tough to work with a client whose request hasn't matured yet. They can be smart, ambitious, and have a promising business. But the most important thing is the realization that they are stuck. Because if the founders are not willing to work on themselves, we'll end up dedicating 80% of our efforts to unproductive activities, trying to rekindle the smoldering embers.

It's a different story when entrepreneurs yearn for change. They've already tried all the known methods and followed advice from employees, consultants, and friends. But, alas, the desired result is still missing. In the words of writer Steven Pressfield, a person is tormented by the eternal question: "Why is this f$*king thing not working?"

Fortunately, in the depths of frustration, they're closer to an answer than ever. In this case, our collaboration is like an F-1 race car pit stop. Our actions are swift, efficient, and synchronized. It feels like the problem is solving itself. For a coach, therapist, or mentor, encountering a self-motivated athlete, client, or student brings the greatest joy.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Leap of Faith /  by Alexander Lyadov

"Wow, I really wanted to work here so badly!" I whispered after the interview in 1995. I had just finished up at the chemistry department of Kyiv University and was working at a Ukrainian-American joint venture. We made shampoos and hair dye because there was a serious shortage in the market. One of my tasks involved going through patent archives to find useful Soviet standards, as well as getting our recipes approved by officials. If that doesn't sound too sexy, well, that's exactly how it was. But I managed to extract the marrow of meaning even from this bone. The team was fantastic, and it turned out the owner had big plans for me. Plus, they paid real money for the work, which was crucial for our young family.

So, when an acquaintance from my English courses mentioned a job opening at a new international advertising agency, I didn't waste any time. At the interview, I was completely smitten – the cozy office, the trendy Macs, and the totally different vibe of the people. They were young, daring, and creative. In short, life here wasn't a quiet stream, it was bubbling with energy.

In advertising, I was a complete zero. The prospect of becoming an account manager for an English-speaking client scared me. By the way it was Ferrero, the top advertiser in Ukraine. Also it felt awkward to say goodbye to the owner who had been so kind to me. But the contrast between what I was doing and what I potentially could do was just too enormous. I didn't know HOW to make the transition, but the WHY behind it justified any risk. While my mind was still uncertain, my soul had already made its choice. I'm glad I took a leap of faith. In what? That in the end, everything will work out well. And it did.

Do you trust your instincts when life takes a sharp turn?

Sincerely yours,

- Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Mind Reboot /  by Alexander Lyadov

In the mornings, I don't get enough sleep because I don't want to let go of the fading day in the evening. But after a workout and breakfast, as soon as I sit down to work, drowsiness tries to swallow me up. I used to fight it, trying to wake up with coffee and self-talk. Besides wasting time and energy, my work effectiveness suffered. Now I do the exact opposite. As soon as drowsiness opens its jaws, I dive straight into its belly.

The workaholic mind screams in horror: "You'll crash out for a couple of hours now! Then you won't have time for anything, you'll be late everywhere, and you'll let everyone down!" And indeed, my body plunges into oblivion as soon as I find myself in the chair. Sometimes, I even see a dream. Though more often, it's a kaleidoscope of thought fragments, sensations, and memories. The mind is right about one thing – it's a true reboot.

And then comes the miracle. Diving into the depths of the subconscious, I quickly reach the bottom, push off, and resurface. The whole process usually takes 10 to 20 minutes. Turns out, the "couple of hours" is an irrational fear of the mind, a defense against the "off" mode. But what a transformation! My state before and after is like night and day. Clarity of mind, focus of attention, and a bubbling of creative forces. I eagerly dive into my work.

Sincerely yours,

- Alexander

P.S. If it's hard for you to disconnect, try wearing a sleep mask and headphones. Listen to the meditation (​Non-Sleep Deep Rest​) by Professor Andrew Huberman.

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Peak Perfomance /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

Are you familiar with that moment when approaching a problem feels tough? You walk around it in circles and almost start but then get distracted by something else. So, you manage to plow through a heap of unpleasant tasks that now become welcome. You summon willpower to make a repeated attempt. But it's like trying to connect two magnets that are facing each other with the same poles. You're expending a bunch of energy, nerves, and time in vain.

But later, you feel as if you have drunk a glass of champagne. You tackled the problem dashingly, daringly, on a spree. It was shocked by your pressure and resolved itself. What happened? After all, the complexity of the task didn't change. The context remained the same. You became different.

Your states before and after differ like at a body temperature of 104.0 and 98.6. In the first case, a person experiences a headache, and muscle aches. Sometimes he hallucinates. In short, until the mercury column drops, clear thinking is out of the question. When it comes to complex tasks, the strategy is the same — first and foremost, you need to change yourself. This means getting yourself into peak condition to provide a worthy response to chaos. For example, many wrestlers, before a championship match, diligently perform warm-up rituals and listen to special music to enter, you could say, a trance. The greater the challenge, the closer your inner state should be to perfection.

Conclusion: Your priority should not be the problem but your optimal state.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

The Central Problem /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

Someone in the company always has to know its central problem. That protects the team from wasting resources, you know, throwing stones for nothing. People can't stand boredom, so they'll come up with their own entertainment. And as long as they get paid, they'll look for cool problems and then try to solve them.

If an organization is alive, it's guaranteed to have many problems. And imagination can turn each of them into a catastrophe. But not all problems are equal. Like, a person with malaria shouldn't be worrying about shivering or sweating. Problems not only have a hierarchy, some are more important than others. The secret is, in complex systems, most problems usually stem from one core issue.

In theory, any employee, investor, or consultant can get to the core problem. But in practice, hardly anyone can do it. First of all, the current situation has to bother a person more than anything else. Secondly, they must know the business inside out, like super intimately. And thirdly, they have to understand that nobody else will handle the situation for them. You already figured out that this person is the founder.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

The Choice /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

When dealing with anything, you'll face a crucial choice. You can focus on either form or function. Both can bring you satisfaction, reward, and popularity. Yet, they hold completely different meanings.

Let's say your passion is bodybuilding. Here, the battle is all about size, definition, muscle symmetry, and balance. The goal is to impress judges with a flawless physique. Strength, endurance, and flexibility matter, but only to a certain extent. If something stimulates hypertrophy – great! If not – out! Another matter, if your aim is to win wrestling matches. You'll focus on studying strategies, mastering techniques, building psychological resilience, explosive power, and more. Muscle proportions and body aesthetics take a back seat. Don't believe it? Take a look at a wrestler's ears.

The same applies to content creation. One approach is to master tricks that captivate and hold readers' attention, keeping them engaged. The alternative is to learn how to express your thoughts in a clear way while still being true to yourself. The former aims to distract readers from their problems and entertain them. The latter invites readers to see things and themselves as they truly are.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Freeing Your White Pencil /  by Alexander Lyadov

What's the use of a white pencil? For beginners - none. They need contrast on paper. But for an artist, a white pencil is a valuable tool. You can't create intricate images with charcoal alone. You need the whole range of colors for nuances. A true artist draws what didn't exist before them. They share their unique perspective and essence with the world. An artist won't say, "This color is bad. I don't need it." Everything has its place and time.

In life, many people reject what they have. They see something in themselves as evil, so they suppress or push it away. Many times, this comes from someone important in their life - a father, mother, grandfather, aunt, or someone else. This person had a strong impact on the child, but their image within the family was negative. The child absorbed everything but locked unwanted traits in a dungeon.

As you grow older, you'll find something missing in you. You'll want to express yourself fully, but something will persistently hold you back. What is it? It's what has always been and still is within you, but it's currently inaccessible. That dreaded trait is your white pencil. You need to study this instrument with curiosity to understand its limits and purpose. When you grasp it, you free yourself from more chains. As a result, your personality grows.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

A Healthy Person's Norm /  by Alexander Lyadov

A healthy person should be able to do 1,000 squats in 19 minutes wall sit for 15 minutes," said the rehab specialist from FC "Dynamo," and it made me gasp. So far, my "record" with trembling legs is just 500 squats and 8 minutes of wall sit. Being a "healthy person" seems like an impossible feat. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have reached that level even before my knee surgery. And yet, every day, I practiced jiu-jitsu, lifted weights, or swung kettlebells.

Some might object to such high standards, saying that it's hard to find such people even in a sports club. But for me, it illustrates how low the demands are for our bodies in city life. Smooth roads, elevators, scooters, cars, and delivery services have virtually eliminated physical effort and labor. Someone might brush it off, saying, "There are no situations where you need to do 1,000 squats. Having such strength reserves is excessive."

In times of war, that argument is laughable. Life can exponentially complicate at any moment because chaos knows no limits. There are countless real scenarios where we might pray for any extra strength. But even in a peaceful oasis of stability and quiet (where?), there's a reason to challenge our bodies much more.

Biochemist and science communicator Rhonda Patrick talked about how being in great physical shape in midlife delayed the onset of dementia in women by 9.5 years. Larger brain volumes have also been linked to increased physical activity [​​1​]. Recent research suggests that grip strength is a biomarker of biological age [​​2​​]. Another study showed that higher levels of physical activity may be causally linked to a reduced risk of depression. Moreover, physical exercises ease depression symptoms, aid recovery from depressive disorders, and prevent relapses [​​3​].

It seems to me that systematically increasing physical activity is a win-win for everything.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Extra weight /  by Alexander Lyadov

War showed us how little we really need things. My wife and daughter in England and I in Ukraine rely on a simple list every day. Turns out, about 80% of the stuff in our Kyiv apartment is filled with things we wouldn't even miss if they disappeared.

As long as life goes smoothly on its tracks, it feels like carrying the extra burden isn't that hard. The true cost became clear when we moved from one apartment to another a few years ago. Paying the movers and arranging the items in the new place, I started to question the wisdom of possessing all this "treasure."

Owning anything is not just the privilege of using it. But also it is the burden of preserving it from decay, damage, theft, and so on. Additionally, purchasing freezes financial resources and limits mobility. However, even a high price isn't a problem if we have a clear answer to "What for?".

In other words, what purpose does this thing serve? Either you use it often, so it helps the pulse of life, whether it's business, family, education, hobbies, sports, coziness, or art. Or you keep the thing for protection from sudden blows of fate. Everything else is extravagance, laziness to think, and nonsense. At the very least, let decisions be intentional.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Focus and Vulnerability /  by Alexander Lyadov

In sparring, the biggest danger isn't your opponent. It's the neighboring pairs fighting around you. When all your attention is focused on the problem in front of you, you become vulnerable from the sides and the back. I'll never forget how a neighbor crushed my comrade's knee when he stepped back in the heat of the fight.

Being able to focus on something makes you effective. But at the same time, it works against you. For instance, self-defense experts warn about the danger of wearing headphones on the street. By getting rid of the distracting noise, you risk missing an important signal to save yourself.

This dilemma is typical for some founders. You need to "keep your finger on the pulse," meaning immerse yourself in the operations. But it's also essential to rise above the business to feel the context and not miss threats or favorable trends. So, what to do?

My favorite coach, John Danaher, advises training the skill of following your neighboring conversations on the mats. In other words, allocate a part of your attention to being aware of what's happening around you. Think of the Chinese symbol of Yin and Yang. During the phase of rapid company growth, it's crucial to keep the chaos under control. So, founders should catapult themselves from the operations, at least quarterly or, even better, once a week.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

The Energy to Start /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

People believe that procrastination is putting off important but unpleasant tasks. But sometimes I find it difficult to start what excites, inspires, and gives meaning to me. Does it sound like a paradox?

For instance, after one-day diagnostic sessions, I prepare an analytical report for the client. In it, I delve into the core business problem, strategic priorities, decisions made, and recommendations. It's not just mechanically processing session notes; it's a genuine creative act. From ten hours of content, I must extract the essence. I need to describe the phenomenon as it is, not as we wish to see it. The process is so captivating that I become absorbed in it. So why is it so hard to begin?

The process demands immense focus. I must shut out any thoughts about myself, family, friends, and the world. However, entering this focused state is not easy. It's like starting a chemical reaction; it requires activation energy. You'd think, there it is, the desired activity, but no – at first, you have to overcome the energy barrier. So, I end up going in circles, gathering my strength. This is how a future entrepreneur raises funds for the capital stock. Then a thought pierces me. What if I were to delve into something my heart does not embrace? Then the undertaking would demand a sacrifice beyond all measure.

Conclusion: Be selective in what you dedicate yourself to.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.