Together Into the Unknown / November 22, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

In 1993 my girlfriend and I were vacationing in the Carpathians.

One day, I spontaneously suggested we run down a steep mountain.

Hand in hand, we flew, picking up speed like an avalanche.

It was flight, because our feet barely touched the crumbling earth.

We were filled with wild fear and... enchanted joy.

Seconds full of youth, love and freedom. I still can’t believe we didn’t trip and crash. Nor can I understand why this girl agreed to marry me later.

Sometimes we laugh nervously, recalling that ecstatic descent.

I don’t even know what force inspired me to take that risk, leading us firmly from the mountain to the valley. My mind certainly wouldn’t allow it today. Although...

Then again, the mind never understands why we seek experiences like this. I must have instinctively known: “Marina will walk with me to the end.”

Now, after 29 years of marriage, I’m thankful to fate for our flight.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

How can I help you?
If you've long been trying to understand what is limiting you and/or your business and how to finally give important changes a push, then The Catalyst Session is designed specifically for you. Book it here.

Gift of Winter / November 21, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

If winter didn’t exist, we’d have to invent it.

Imagine the absurdity: spring, summer, fall, spring, summer, fall…

Like a weightlifter yanking the barbell, locking it at the peak, and lowering it—only to repeat the motion endlessly.

Between sets, you need rest. A pause. A cessation.

From the perspective of hyperactive living, any pause feels like a symbolic death. The irony? Pushing nonstop often lands the overachievers in a hospital bed—or worse.

Mania always brings its shadow: depression. The collector from the Reality agency willingly gives money for a spree, but then painfully extracts the debt.

Fun fact: Mania is named after an ancient Greek goddess who drove people mad when they ditched tradition. Our ancestors gave us Sundays, holidays, and vacations for a reason. But restless souls grumble that sleep steals their precious time each night.

Neuroscience has a different take: good sleep, a short nap, or even five minutes of meditation with your eyes closed after learning can:

Help you manage pain,
Support mental health,
Consolidate memories,
Increase neuroplasticity,
Sharpen focus and clarity,
Boost cognitive performance,
Strengthen immunity and hormone production.

Now, take these “pit-stop” benefits and scale them up—from a single person to an entire ecosystem, from a day to months.

Winter is desperately needed—by you, society, and nature. Its cold emptiness removes the unnecessary and rekindles the hunger to love and create.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Not What It Seems / November 20, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Nothing is ever what it seems at first glance—especially when it comes to what holds back a company or an individual’s growth.

That’s why, during strategic sessions, I deliberately ignore the initial theories that pop into my head about what’s wrong with a company. I’m also skeptical of diagnoses made by the client.

If the problem were so obvious, it would have been resolved long ago. Instead, the business stalls for years. Revenues spike, then slump. Customers and employees come and go, but no breakthrough ever happens. Potential buyers show interest—but only half-heartedly, and rarely.

So, where’s the beaver hiding? The one that’s turned a once-rushing river into a swamp?

Finding it requires more than just an algorithm. The hardest part is staying open to the unexpected—remembering that the root of the problem, and the solution, might lie in the least likely place.

You need to prepare for the session—then be ready to toss the template. I recall an old case when I interviewed every top executive and shareholder in a company. They were all smart and experienced, yet none of them grasped the secret to the company’s success. It was something the founder had mentioned offhand, without realizing its significance.

Openness to the new creates fertile ground for breakthroughs.

It's a moment I've loved since my days working in advertising. Back then, hitting a dead end was routine. When tomorrow’s big pitch to the client demanded a “Big Idea,” but five hours of brainstorming only deepened the despair.

Then one of us would return from the restroom and say, “You know, I just thought of something…”

“That’s it!” I’d thought as the brainstorming moderator. The key was not to crush that fragile new idea but to nurture it and let it grow within the group’s mind. The next day, the client would leave thrilled. Sales would soar. Recognition. Gratitude.

If you’re working on your company’s strategy, cultivate openness to the new—in your team and yourself. This is the key that unlocks unstoppable growth.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

400 Million Years of Partnership / November 19, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Symbiosis is a close community of living organisms from different biological species. It’s more than interaction, but not yet a merger. Partners do something essential—even irreplaceable—for one another, which increases their chances of survival in the wild.

One has in abundance what the other lacks. And vice versa.

Take jackdaws, for example. They clean deer of parasites and, during shedding season, pluck out tufts of fur to use in their nests. Judging by the deer’s expression, it doesn’t suffer at all—in fact, it seems to enjoy the experience.

In obligatory symbiosis, the partners are so interdependent that they can’t survive without each other. Lichens are a classic example: their bodies are made of cells from algae and fungi, forming a partnership that’s thrived for over 400 million years.

A partnership is strong when the benefits far outweigh the inevitable costs. And there’s always a cost. You have to consider the other’s needs. Sometimes, that can be annoying. You may start thinking you’re the major contributor and could manage just fine on your own.

Sometimes, losing someone is the only way to truly understand their worth.

Anyone can start a partnership, but only mature people can sustain one. If your partnership has endured and continues to bring value, it’s a testament to both your hard work and good fortune.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Wealth or Asceticism? / November 18, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

I once worked in the wealth management industry, where I "had to" interact with extremely wealthy people. Lavish offices, sprawling apartments, trendy resorts in Italy and France—the whole glamorous package.

I admit, there was a certain charm in sitting on the Piazza San Marco on a warm night, glass of wine in hand, talking with fascinating people. Among those self-made individuals, I never met a mediocre mind.

Of course, wealth doesn’t solve existential problems, but it does ease life’s friction like prosecco, lubricant, and ibuprofen. It’s no wonder that getting used to the perks of wealth is quick and effortless.

But I’ve also had a completely opposite experience.

I’ve taken several trips to India, where I lived like a monk. Harsh surroundings, simple food, total silence, and ten hours of sitting meditation each day, whether in the cold or heat.

All around me were unfamiliar Indians, mostly from the poorest segments of society.

Here, we each tried to solve our existential dilemmas by sacrificing pleasures and comfort. Strangely enough, I also got used to these self-imposed limitations very quickly.

In fact, it took effort to return to the chaos of worldly life.

Which is better—wealth or asceticism? I don’t know, but I’ve seen how both paths can turn a person’s life into hell.

I prefer the middle way in Buddhism. It’s where, instead of swinging between two extremes, a person strives to find that “in-between” state.

Enough without excess. Quiet joys of life without guilt or shame.

When desires are neither indulged nor suppressed, you have the chance to study them and better understand yourself and others.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Be the Wave / November 17, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

It's amazing how quickly a tired body recovers when you give it a chance. In the heat of a struggle, this insight comes easier, and then you can apply it to business and life.

Why is it “easier”? Because it doesn't come through your head—it hits you straight in the body.

The grappling match lasts “only” five to seven minutes. But if you’re tense all the time, by the second minute your body stiffens, you’ve got no strength to move, no air to breathe. All you can think is, “Let this end, please!”

Forget about winning, let alone enjoying the game.

The problem isn’t with extreme tension but with how long you hold onto it. It’s like trying to store water not in a pot but in a strainer. Every second works against you, stealing the precious water of life.

But everything changes if you pause for “just” a couple of seconds. It's like breathing in the sea breeze—it refreshes your mind, body, and soul.

Got yourself into a good position? Take a quick rest, even if it’s just for a moment.

I know this turbo-boost effect well, yet it surprises me every time. Just a second ago, I was groaning, “I'm done,” and now I’m singing, “The show goes on!” Out of nowhere, a burst of energy appears—isn’t it a miracle?

What did I do? Nothing. I simply let the emptiness fill itself.

The pattern of an experienced grappler is like the ocean tide or the flicker of stars. It’s a sequence of long and short signals, like a coded message in Morse code. When an entrepreneur is tense 24/7/365, what kind of signal is that? One long, flat line. And what does that mean on a heart monitor? Exactly.

Life is breath and pulse. Both symbolically and literally.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Rebirth Needed / November 16, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

What do new entrepreneurs, investors, CEOs, or consultants subconsciously expect when taking on a promising project?

"Improvements in the business will be radical and immediate."

An experienced person knows that having a vision, an investment thesis, and a strategic plan is one thing, but reality is quite another.

And the larger and older the organization, the bigger that gap.

A new leader bursts into the organization full of energy, making a lot of noise and stirring things up. But then, he gets stuck, like a wasp in a spider's web. The ideas may be great, and the authority and resources are there, but the results just don't come.

That web? It’s the people on the ground, or rather, the network of their interests.

Even if the organization is now one step away from collapse, it’s still serving someone’s local interests. Maybe it’s just inertia, but there’s still some movement. Thus there will be resistance.

It’s like they’d rather end up with nothing than change. And that’s often true. Who is the most open to change? The one who’s lost everything.

That’s why a wise leader renews the organization by forcing it to go through a symbolic death. For example, he might fire most of the staff, tetire an outdated brand, or sell off non-core assets.

Once the company passes through its starting point, it will grow again.

Samo Burja, the founder of the consulting firm Bismarck Analysis, which studies the political and institutional landscape, put it clearly:

"So many people experience in the later, more bureaucratized stages in organization, how difficult it is to fix something that's broken. There's no better moment then the founding of organization or a company to fix something what's broken. Every point later in its history it's going to be more difficult. There will always be vested interests. Right before you create a structure there's no vested interest. Ss soon as you create a structure there's a vested interest. It will automatically fight you. So that's why there's an element perhaps of luck in founding companies and other organizations. And there's also this also sort of flash of brilliance, a spark of brilliance, where everything just works, it just works — too well, and just works from day one."

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Losing to Find / November 15, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

I used to write the text first, then hunt online for the perfect illustration.

Sometimes, it was frustrating—I'd spend half an hour writing, only to wait another hour or more until I could shout, "Eureka! The perfect match!"

Was all that search time wasted? Not at all!

The thing is, while wandering through the winding alleys of the internet, I would stumble upon rubies and emeralds I didn't need right then. But I'd carefully stash them in my bag and keep hunting for ideas.

Today, my "Ideas" folder is bursting with treasures for every taste. All I have to do is flip through sketches, photos, art pieces, archaeological finds, jokes, animal videos, and more.

The right illustration hooks my curiosity like a fish on a line. The article brewing inside me awakens, like a snowdrop in spring.

In the past, the image always followed the word. But now, more often than not, I choose a symbol, and it draws the text out of me.

My toolkit has expanded—I can start this way or that.

But the real treasure is in the surprise of the find. I used to suffer, thinking I was wasting my time chasing the "perfect" illustration. But my losses were gains. I just couldn’t see it clearly back then.

And what if this little example, like a fractal, reflects Life as a whole?

What if everything you and I have ever lost, ruined, or failed at turns out to be the source of our prosperity, victories, and growth?

The one who turns harm into gain by extracting meaning is truly invincible.

I hope to become one someday. And you?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Business Strategy Questions / November 14, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

What question does a business strategy answer?

Many founders believe it answers the question: “How?” As if, on a journey, all you need to do is choose your transport and level of comfort. Everything else should be clear to everyone involved, right?

Unfortunately, no one knows where they’re now or where they’re headed, and most importantly, why.

Tell this to a company leader, and he won’t believe you. After all, he’s spent years explaining it to his team in every possible way. Plus, meetings are filled with discussions about customer needs, competitor analysis, and so on.

“The company's goals are in the air we breathe—it's just common sense!”

But ask the leader to define the starting point A and the destination point B. Nine times out of ten, there’s hesitation. Even he lacks clarity.

So what can you expect from the employees? You'll hear a mix of different versions, which in this case is bad news. It means everyone’s pulling in their own direction, wasting money, nerves, and time.

During strategy sessions, I interview not only founders but also top managers. Every time I’m amazed at how much they struggle with questions like: “Where are we? Where are we going? What for?”

There’s enough uncertainty outside. It’s worse when it’s inside too.

The good news? Competitors are in no better shape.

Thus, by clarifying your strategy within the company, you'll create an advantage out of nothing and get ahead of the game.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Patience, Not Control / November 13, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Have you ever noticed how time can stretch like rubber?

Sometimes it drags out a (un)pleasant experience into an eternity. Other times, it suddenly shrinks, squeezing a long chain of events into a flash.

Time isn't like some rigid measuring stick.

And remember those moments when nothing new happened, even though you were craving change with all your heart? You got frustrated because this “slowness” shattered your expectations.

Then, all of a sudden—bam!—an avalanche swept through, dragging everything with it.

Just a second ago, you felt like you were stuck in a swamp while everyone you knew sped down the highway. And now you're hanging on for dear life, trying to keep up with that avalanche, feeling both terrified and thrilled.

Funny, isn't it? Nothing feels right this way or that.

Time is a useful, yet imaginary construct of the mind. What's real is your personal experience. Sure, you can compare it to others, but why bother? Neither you nor they can ever truly walk in each other’s shoes.

But someone inside you expects change on such-and-such a date.

Who does he think he is, trying to control a great mystery? Your personality is like a rare, exotic plant. Growth will happen, but when and how? That’s unknown. What does a wise gardener do?

First of all, he patiently and carefully watches over the process. Where it's clear, he helps with protection, fertilizers, and watering. But he has no expectations, and certainly no need for interventions.

He trusts that the Life hidden in the seed will reveal itself.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Earn Your Body / November 12, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

It's commonly believed that as we age, we inevitably lose muscle mass and bone density. People say, "You can't fight nature."

Everyone nods at the statistics, and facts are stubborn things.

However, more and more medical experts are starting to disagree. According to new studies, the main cause of the body's decline isn't the number of years lived but rather a person's inactivity.

Driven by this false belief, a person voluntarily chooses to grow old.

In youth, muscles, ligaments, and bones stay strong, even if someone spends days sitting at a desk. Nature gives us these resources in advance, assuming we'll need them to explore and defend territory, build homes, raise children, and so on.

Remember how after a wild night out, you could wake up without a hangover? But around age 40 or 50, nature checks in: “Listen, I no longer expect you to fulfill some evolutionary program. Are you still going to use the body functions? If so, I'll be happy to leave it to you, if not, I'll switch it off to save energy."

Now, every day, you have to labour to prove: “I need this body.”

This doesn't mean extreme sports, of course. High injury risk isn't the goal. But the body needs to strain, ache, tremble, and sweat.

Only then will muscle strength, bone density, and ligament toughness not only be maintained but actually grow.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Healing Yourself / November 11, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Psychedelics work much like psychotherapy.

I know, it sounds odd. Drinking a jungle vine brew in the Amazon isn’t the same as stepping into the office of a renowned therapist in the heart of the city.

There, your being plunges into an indescribable mystery, while here, a pro can methodically explain every step of what’s going on.

But forget the differences in approach—look at their essence.

It’s not DMT, psilocybin, CBT, or psychoanalysis that heals. Your body, mind, and spirit heal themselves in an environment that accelerates change.

This can mean:

shedding alien habits,
letting go of what’s past,
finding value in the ugly,
marveling at the “useless,”
facing unbearable fear and enduring it,
allowing a love for life, people, and yourself to bloom.
revealing your true self and being accepted for who you are.

Whether it’s a sprouting plant, a fertilized egg, or a breakthrough business idea, every new thing is fragile and vulnerable. One day it will grow strong and firm, but for now, it needs protection and love.

If you give a tiny acorn a chance, it can become a mighty oak that stands for 1,500 years.

In the right conditions, cell division happens on its own. You’ll be amazed at how quickly regeneration, development, and growth occur. Reserves are unlocked. Everything emerges from nothing.

In other words, you suddenly realize you’re not who you thought you were. You are something entirely different. But this newness doesn’t confuse or scare you; it feels like a long-lost treasure, now found.

Psychedelics and psychotherapy reintroduce you to yourself.

Great power demands vigilance and respect. Don’t swallow a pill handed to you by a stranger “just for fun.” And baring your soul to a therapist on the first session? That’s overkill too.

It’s important to create a laboratory environment where every step of self-exploration is manageable and safe. Learn the limits of each tool. Move at a pace that’s comfortable for you.

“Nosce te ipsum”—“Know thyself,” as the seven sages advised.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

So-Called Civilized / November 10, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Neanderthals—either extinct or, according to another theory, assimilated members of the human species. The last known ones roamed Eurasia up to around 40,000 years ago [Wiki].

If you bumped into a Neanderthal on the street today, would you be surprised? Probably not. He wouldn’t stand out much in a crowd. In terms of adaptability, he could even thrive, especially during chaotic times like the post-Soviet 90s.

Humans haven’t changed all that much, even though the line leading to Homo sapiens branched off from other hominids 6–7 million years ago.

Sure, our technological and cultural achievements are impressive. But notice how easily and eagerly the modern people dive into violence—whether it’s crushing ideological opponents, sparking mass riots, or inciting pogroms.

Civilization is not even the skin of Homo sapiens; it’s merely a dusting of pollen. There are two extreme views on human nature.

Some believe that each of us has a light within, and all we need is a little help to let it shine. Others are convinced that darkness lies in every heart, and it must be kept in check.

The first group aims for utopia, but in the end, the “dark triad” personalities chew up the idealists and climb to the top.

The second group’s focus is on imposing order. Unfortunately, they often get carried away, stifling growth and progress in society.

Maturity is recognizing both the dark and the light within society and the individual. Only then can we safely unlock the potential hidden in all of us.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Two On One / November 9, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

What trait in a partner is valuable in business and in life? It's something you might call resilience, indestructibility, stability.

A person who holds onto himself despite pressure from all sides.

Such constancy offers support like an ice floe in the sea does for a polar bear. Just one more step forward — in this chaos, that's enough.

It's a bonus if your partner can also contain the chaos inside you. That will protect your business from reckless leaps, and your enemies will lose their fire when they suddenly hit a wall.

Of course, a partner's resilience has its limits. But that's not a concern when your partnership is strong.

How can you tell? It's when your vulnerabilities and your partner's don't overlap.

If in grappling you grab an athlete’s forearm with one hand, he’ll easily break free by twisting toward his thumb. But clasp his arm with both hands forming a circle, and it's ten times harder for him to escape. This is the “Two on One” principle.

By compensating for each other's weaknesses, you multiply your combined strength.

Ideally, you should also have different personality types, life experiences and superpowers. A synthesis of symbolic opposites will both endure and crush anything in its path.

But there's a catch. It’s hard for those partners to endure each other. To acknowledge your own gaps and appreciate the other's weirdness, you both have to be mature individuals.

That's why successful business and life partnerships are rare.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Leap Beyond Illusion / November 8, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Sometimes, it’s just a tiny bump, yet a man can’t seem to crawl over it. Other times, the same man leaps over a towering wall with ease.

The height of the obstacle doesn’t matter. What truly counts is the thirst for life.

That’s the name of a sharp Jack London story I suggest you revisit—especially if you’ve hit a dead end.

This thirst for life shows up as a drive toward a specific state B, which feels better than your current state A. The bigger the gap between what you crave and what you have, the higher you can jump.

But there’s a catch. State B can’t just be a conviction of the mind, even if everyone around you insists it’s what you need.

The impulse to move from A to B isn’t rational or irrational. You are drawn there despite your fear and inability to explain.

Your job is to help yourself, not get in your own way. This means describing both A and B as clearly as possible. It’s crucial to understand what lets you breathe freely or, on the flip side, what chokes your throat.

What stops you are illusions:

1. A person believes he understands the nature of his obstacle. But if that were true, he would’ve found a gate or a springboard by now. The stubbornness of the barrier hints: “Nothing is what it seems.”

2. He’s convinced he knows exactly what he wants and where he’s headed. But soon he is quite confused after a few probing questions.

When the illusions are gone, you don’t even need to jump—you simply fly.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

One is Enough / November 7, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Power-hungry global bureaucracies, corrupt media, manipulative social networks—today, there are plenty of arguments for why we have little influence over anything.

But things aren't so simple when you look closer at your life.

For example, I’ve met a few people who split my life into “before” and “after.” With some, I had long conversations; with others, I only met once. Some I knew only through their actions or their work.

Just a brief encounter between us was enough to change me.

Champion coach John Danaher revolutionized jiu-jitsu, showing the world the power of leg attacks. But what changed John’s own perspective was a single phrase, when grappler Dean Lister asked him, “Why ignore 50% of the human body?”

The best catalyst for change is asking the right question at the right time.

“A child can only admire himself if his mother admires him first,” explained a psychotherapist. Someone has to gift the child love. If not his mother, then someone else—a grandmother, a neighbor, or a coach. Otherwise, the light will never break through the darkness of his soul.

When a diamond bends a ray of light, how many people see the reflection? Your personality is a diamond. Life is the jeweler. And the light is...

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Hunting, Business, and Life / November 6, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

To put it simply, you can represent any company through three components:

Marginal Profit
Operating Expenses
Net Profit

How can you explain this to a hunter so he gets it?

Think of revenue as the game he catches—deer or grouse he brings back. Every arrow he shoots is a variable cost.

When you subtract those Variable Costs from Revenue, you get Marginal profit. This is the food that will feed his family, and provide a reserve for future lean times (i.e., investments).

But catching and bringing home game isn’t the whole story—you still have to cook it. And while the hunter’s out in the wild, someone has to keep the home clean, cozy, and safe for the children.

Preserving what you already have—that’s the essence of operating expenses.

They’re essential, though hard to pin down precisely. For they affect the hunter’s marksmanship only indirectly, by keeping his mind at ease.

Marginal profit minus Operating Expenses equals Net Profit.

Of course, there can be a Net Loss. Imagine the family is now packed with aunts, uncles, and neighbors, all promising to help out around the house. Everyone seems busy, but it’s hard to say if comfort and order have really improved.

If the appetite of these relatives exceeds the hunter’s capacity to bring home the game, the whole group will start to go hungry. But the hunter, too, might start missing his mark, knowing no one’s back home to kill a snake or scrub away mold.

What’s needed is someone who cares about the system as a whole, not just one part. Someone who’ll make and execute tough, uncomfortable decisions.

Someone who doesn’t just value profit, but sees the Flow of Life behind it.

Who is this? The Founder, the Creator, the Master.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Unlock Yourself / November 5, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

The problems holding us back in life are like tricky locks.

Intuition whispers that something precious lies behind the door: treasure, freedom, or a personal meaning. But the door remains impassable.

We ring and knock with our fists, waiting, then banging again.

“I want to reach the next level,” says one client. “It’s like I’ve hit an invisible wall,” explains another. "The old methods don't work, and I don't know how to do it the new way,” adds a third, frustrated.

People are looking for someone to open the door for them. They do not realize that they are the key.

This is a tough truth to grasp alone. People tend to see the lock as something outside themselves—believing that circumstances or even evil people are holding them back.

Yet the years pass, partners and situations change, but the outcome stays the same. Finally, a person realizes, “Maybe it’s all about me?”

Then begins the long search for an “engineer” to fix him.

This journey is full of disappointments because a person is not a clock to be repaired. It’s a blessing if you meet someone who turns you back toward yourself (it happened to me). His honest, attentive gaze reflects the real you.

You are everything: the question and the answer, the safe and the code, the host and the guest.

And the door opens on its own: "Well, finally. Come on in, dear!"

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Master or Slave of the Snowball? / November 4, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Imagine you’re rolling a snowball uphill. With each step, it grows in size and weight. But the climb gets harder and harder.

Everyone around you admires your success. You're exhausted, but proud. Still, there’s that gnawing worry growing day by day. You feel your position growing more precarious. As if all this success were being held up not by a strong rope but by a thin thread.

If you don’t change your approach, disaster is inevitable.

Now, imagine a different scenario. Same hill, same snow, same you. But this time, there’s no need to push anything uphill. Just let a small snowball roll down.

Gravity will do the work, quickly turning it into a snowball, then into an avalanche.

Notice the principle here: results can grow infinitely as your effort approaches zero. This ideal may be unattainable, but it’s valuable as a guiding star.

So, here’s a formula for business and life:

Find a position where the environment works with you.
Put in effort to create necessary and sufficient conditions.
Make time to observe when the context changes.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Love What You Do or Not? / November 3, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

The popular advice “Do what you love” is misguided. But not because doing what you love is harmful. The issue lies elsewhere.

Unless we’re talking about dusting or IG scrolling, any worthwhile endeavor will take months, if not years, to reach a point of excellence. Until then, the learning process can feel difficult, discouraging, and dull.

The path of mastery is rarely quick and smooth; it’s usually winding and rough.

Moreover, there are moments when we hate even the things we deeply love. For instance, writing is a cherished part of my day. But it’s a bitter feeling when I’ve been staring at a blank screen for an hour with nothing to show for it.

Or, sometimes we’re thrilled with the result, but the actual work or a particular phase of it brings irritation and resistance. Think of morning workouts for a night owl, or the sales process for an introvert.

Something else redeems the price we pay in these cases.

But first, let’s address the main obstacle — we don’t know ourselves well. Only years later do we start to understand why we acted one way and not another. What we want for our future is often a mystery.

Thank God, we have a clue — rely on your Interest.

No one in the world can explain why something intrigues you. Nor should they. Interest bubbles up inside you, like a hiccup or a dream. It’s yours alone, because it can’t be faked or forced.

Interest points to a potential personal meaning.

It’s not a guarantee, but it’s an opportunity. Better to give it a shot. If all goes well, as you dig into something new, your interest will stick around and even grow.

Conclusion: start with interest, and love will follow.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.