Weaving Your Pattern by Alexander Lyadov

If I could be 20 again, I'd say: "No."

Yes, being young is nice, but back then I was asleep.

Every day was full of events, but it was like a dream. In other words, I wasn't making my life, it was happening to me.

And then, someone punctured my beautiful, airy balloon with a needle. The balloon was my illusions, someone was reality, and the puncture was a harsh collision with it.

It was a painful experience, and my world lost its height and volume. But, in taking away much, reality gave me an unexpected gift.

The veil fell from my eyes, and everything around started to look different. The scattered threads began to weave into a single pattern.

This isn't about learning how to create a 'successful success'. It's about seeing yourself, people, and the world as they really are. And, most importantly, being okay with that.

Interestingly, each new day accelerates this important process.

It turns out that youth, maturity, and old age are each priceless in their own way.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Your Eureka is Inside by Alexander Lyadov

All the answers you need are already inside you.

How so? It's simple:

The owner of the problem is also the carrier of the solution.

After all, nothing arises out of nowhere.

Like a beaver, you've been building your dam for a long time.

So, in your unique challenge, you are a world-class expert.

Therefore, you, more than anyone else, are close to solving it.

Don't believe it? Look around.

How does a warrior achieve victory? He must study the enemy inside and out.

How does a Buddhist resolve a koan? She must merge with the question as one.

One day, enlightenment dawns, and all the pieces fall into place.

External factors only hasten or delay this process.

Knowing all this, you have one task - find the catalyst.

A situation, a community or a person can fulfil this function.

The catalyst speeds up your Eureka!

Want an example? Here's a ​testimonial from my client​:

"Alexander has a quick mind and openness, allowing him to see the situation in a non-standard, 'out of the box' way. I'm certain that this yields a super-positive ROI — obtaining a significant insight in a compressed timeframe that otherwise might take years to develop."

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Morning Metamorphosis by Alexander Lyadov

Every morning, I undergo a transformation. There's no other way to describe it.

In about an hour and a half, my state changes from "-" to "+."

I usually wake up feeling gloomy. I went to bed late, and air raid sirens woke me up during the night. My dog impatiently whines. An old injury aches. In short, a "good" morning!

Reluctantly, I prepare for my workout, whether it's jiu-jitsu, kettlebells, or mace. A sneaky thought flashes: "Maybe skip today?" But my body follows the rails of habit, and the thought dissipates like mist. Muscles do their familiar job, regardless of the mind's reflection. Along with streams of sweat, gloominess, and annoyance leave me.

A different person emerges from the contrasting shower. There's wild fatigue in my body, but clarity in my mind and peace in my soul. I curiously recall what's on my agenda for the day. The change in mindset is so significant that I'm amazed every time. And the more this transformation repeats, the easier it is to start it next time. That's how faith turns into knowledge. The mind, body, and psyche influence each other more than we expect.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Your Inner Island by Alexander Lyadov

Inside each of us, there is a small island of stability. But right there, within us, lies the ocean of chaos.

At times, our eyes behold a paradise. Golden sands, azure waters, and gentle sunlight. It's easy to love this beautiful life. And then, out of nowhere, a storm sweeps in. Lightning tears through the black fabric of the sky. Monstrous waves crash onto the island, one after another. It feels like the end of the world.

All this drama unfolds in our minds. External events have an impact, but not in equal measure. For example, one person in the queue resorts to fists over a trivial matter. Meanwhile another, terminally ill, exudes calm, confidence, and serenity.

How is this possible? Shouldn't it be the other way around? No, what matters is not what happens to us but how we perceive ourselves in all of this. In essence, throughout life, we expand our island, building up the sand. The goal is to have solid ground beneath our feet the moment of truth comes.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Your Inner Demons by Alexander Lyadov

You have demons inside you.

Just like I do.

Just like all humans do.

These demons are not universal; they are unique to you.

Therefore, someone else's advice has limited value.

You have to handle them on your own, one by one.

It's going to be an epic struggle for power.

They will attempt to seduce, frighten, or confuse you in countless ways.

But you will gain control and submit them, without a doubt.

And then, there will be a surprise waiting for you.

Demons turn out to be incredibly productive.

Pursuing their obsessions, they work 24/7/365.

They have simply lacked a master to give them wise commands.

With time, you will come to appreciate their contributions more.

You'll realize that demons have power, or more precisely, superpower.

The amusing thing is that this superpower isn't theirs, but solely yours.

Once you accept this, the mission is complete.

The curse of the demons becomes a gift of the angels.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Your Life's Axis by Alexander Lyadov

A single graph reshaped my view of the world, people, and myself.

I can't recall the author—Frankl, Langley, or Jung.

For most, life flows along the horizontal axis. They ardently flee from all suffering to chase after pleasure.

Options for this pursuit are abundant:

  • Alcohol,

  • Video games,

  • Social networks,

  • Antidepressants,

  • Amassing assets,

  • Ideological battles,

  • Replaying psychological dramas, and so on.

However, along the vertical axis, there is a different kind of life.

Insanity, madness and meaninglessness await you at the bottom. Clarity, order, and personal purpose fuel the ascent.

Changes to the horizontal will not affect the vertical as these axes are perpendicular. Hence the conclusion: no bank account, follower count, or whiskey dosage can fill the existential void.

Conversely, upward movement remains independent of circumstances. All you need is the intention to give meaning to your life. The axes intersect in a cross at one point. That point is you.

You are free to:

  • Fool yourself by moving left to right,

  • Destroy yourself by sliding downward, or

  • Choose the hard way up.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Your Hidden Strength by Alexander Lyadov

It's remarkably easy to tire out a small group of muscles, like your trapezius or forearms. After 25-50 repetitions, the muscle becomes completely 'fatigued.' Trying to muster up willpower is pointless because the physical resources of muscle fibers are exhausted.

Now, let's talk about the big guys - the quadriceps in your thighs. They can handle a monumental workload. Back when I was training at home, I would pick up a 24 kg kettlebell and do several sets of squats, 15-25 reps each. My muscles would swell and protest, signaling that I was nearing my limit. Currently, I'm recovering from a sports injury to my knee. My rehab specialist tasked me with doing 200 squats with two 16 kg kettlebells. To my surprise, I accomplished it.

The first 50 squats are tough, and anything beyond 100 seems impossible. But I command myself to keep going. My thighs groan and complain, but they get the job done. After that, I do eight more different leg exercises. So, I can't really fathom where the limit is for quadriceps. It appears that the mind gives in much earlier than the big muscles. Hmm, then what is the body as a whole capable of?

If you unite your muscles, ligaments, and nerves, empower them with will, fuel them with creativity, and steer them with your mind, the idea of physical limits becomes almost comical. You have no idea what you're really capable of. You can only discover it after achieving what was necessary, even if it wasn't what you initially desired.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Free Spirit by Alexander Lyadov

True entrepreneurs do not depend on circumstances.

Place them in the wilderness; they'll establish a berry supply.

Take away their business, and they'll soon create another.

Instead of losing the B2B segment, they'll master B2C.

They'll shift from offline to online.

Or the other way around.

No matter what hand fate deals them, they stay in the game.

Why? Their life's purpose is to create Something out of Nothing.

In mud, chaos, and darkness, they see hidden potential.

That's why they're unbreakable, adaptable, and always relevant.

Greater freedom is possessed only by mature personalities.

Whatever fate throws at these people, they grow.

Every experience fuels their self-discovery fire.

Even in the toughest situations, they radiate light and warmth.

They are few in number, but that's okay.

It only takes one lighthouse to save many ships in a storm.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Turning Nietzsche Inside Out by Alexander Lyadov

Everyone knows Friedrich Nietzsche's aphorism about the burdens of life.

It's been quoted so often that, alas, its meaning has worn thin.

I find it more useful to turn it inside out:

"If there's no Why to live for, no How can be endured".

This is the key to motivating yourself and others.

  • "How can I turn down new opportunities when one seems better than the other?"

  • "I've long dreamed of expanding into the USA, but I'm not ready to move there."

  • "Sales and finances are crucial, but unfortunately, they're not my forte."

  • "I can't leave my job to start my own business just yet."

  • "I simply don't have time for myself and my family."

  • "I'm too soft-hearted to discipline a team."

If the cost of something seems insurmountable, it's not about the price at all.

Even giving away 1 cent, joule, or second is unbearable if you get nothing in return.

Notice that this is a matter of personal perception. Offer a hand to two drowning people—one will gratefully grab it, while the other will turn away and sink. Fate may bite equally, but some will turn their scar into art, while others will scratch it until it bleeds, to be an eternal victim.

Conclusions:

  1. If you're stuck in the "Yes, but..." dilemma, delve deeper: "For what?"

  2. If a customer is hesitant, provide more value or reduce the risk.

  3. If life feels unbearable, find meaning that redeems that sacrifice.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Eagle's Vision by Alexander Lyadov

A true entrepreneur has what I call the eagle's vision.

It's the ability to soar above the bustling currents of your life.

I'm talking about freeing yourself from your current beliefs. Thank them, for they aided in survival and achieving all that he (or she) has now. But at the same time, some of these beliefs hinder the founder from leveling up in the business game. This sets up an internal conflict. You must part ways with what you cannot let go of. Some people remain in this struggle for years. This state infects the company. As a result, it neither crumbles nor grows. It's stagnation, like still water, if we translate from Latin, "stagnum."

The solution is to take a quantum leap, not in the physical world, but within your own mind first. In other words, imagine your microcosm with no current restrictions at all. It sounds simple, but in my observation, very few can execute this "dead loop" on their own. Beliefs keep a person tied to the mundane earth like a kite to a nylon string.

That's why one of my goals in business therapy is to help founders swiftly spread their wings and reach the heights they've long desired. Even though it's just a mental exercise, when founders return to the ground, they've transformed. Now, they have an answer to the question: 'What for?' New ideas flow naturally, and their desire to bring them to life grows stronger.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


The Impulse To Live And Create by Alexander Lyadov

I regularly meet founders who are puzzled by a strange problem. Their businesses are stable, their health and family life are in order, but something essential is missing. They even feel awkward describing their issue because, because it seems that it is a sin to complain.

These entrepreneurs change hobbies, dabble in the stock market, attend business clubs, and so on. For a while, this entertains them. However, in the basements of their souls, the truth flickers like neon: "It's not that."

Their plane isn't flying; it's just hovering inertially. Why? The engine is silent; there's no spark in it.

The energy of life, vitality, mana, chi, or prana has disappeared.

I prefer a more practical term: curiosity.

It provides you with direction, signs, and support on your journey.

But remove it, and the most rapid growth will come to a halt.

Because without curiosity, a person doesn't live, they merely exist.

Fortunately, this power cannot be lost. At any moment, you can rediscover it within yourself. Confusing curiosity with anything else is impossible. By following it, personal meaning inevitably grows.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Step into discomfort by Alexander Lyadov

We constantly worry about the possibility of something going wrong. All this is implicit, in the background, as if, among other things.

But ask a person directly, "What's the worst that will happen to you if you leave everything as it is?" and they'll find plenty of ways to dodge that question. The paradox is that consciously thinking about the negative isn't something anyone wants to do.

Maybe someone believes it's best not to invite trouble into their life. Like, don't trouble trouble until trouble troubles you. This is similar to a child's magical thinking: If you hide under the blanket, the danger will disappear.

An adult knows that in reality, it's the opposite. The only way to protect yourself from inevitable chaos is to step towards it. Of course, not impulsively, but on your own terms. The better you understand the thing that scares you, the more likely it is that it won't hurt you, it will pass you by. Such knowledge serves as road sign, warning that there's a sharp turn ahead in 100 meters.

Most of us will read this, nod in agreement, and... do nothing about it. We need someone who can help us navigate this uncomfortable path. It's not about listing risks formally; it's about honestly living out the answers to the questions. For this, you need both gentleness and firmness. The former creates safety, the latter keeps you from veering off track. A psychotherapist, guide, or coach can serve as a catalyst for you if they are: a) professional, b) focused on finding the truth, and c) genuinely care about you.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Adapting to Water by Alexander Lyadov

For my workout, I usually swim 2 kilometers. But in the first 100-200 meters, there's always discomfort. My breath gets uneven, my shoulders start to burn, and fatigue fills my body. Maybe a fish thrown onto the shore feels the same way.

Water vividly illustrates the universal effect of entering an unfamiliar environment. It takes time to adapt and know the technique to do it quickly. After all, our bodies know that one mistake in the water can be deadly. So when you inhale wrongly and choke, panic sets in for real. Breathing, and therefore living fully underwater, isn't possible for humans. But the ability to dive rhythmically for a short time solves this problem. And if a beginner nearly drowns in every training session, an experienced swimmer moves as if born with gills. How's that possible?

The master has thoroughly conquered the hostile environment. It's become, if not native, at least familiar to them. And when the risk is reduced to zero, what's left? Chaos turns towards you in a different way, bringing joy, benefits, and health. Your interaction with any novelty, whether in business, education, or personal life, goes the same way. At first, it tries to drown you. But with each immersion, your adaptation to it accelerates.

In the end, you're grateful to fate for pushing you into the "water." Now, not only do you outperform others and feel comfortable in 'danger', but you are more confident that you can succeed at anything new.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Inner journey by Alexander Lyadov

I know that look very well. It's directed inward, not outward. The whole world freezes as you watch your own movie. It could be a drama, a detective story, or even a thriller. Where you're both the popcorn-munching spectator and the main character. On the screen, a stream of feelings, memories, and thoughts flows. Or it's a labyrinth, from which you must find a way out at any cost.

The expedition to the edge of Oikoumene can drain all your strength. Especially if you get lost, go in circles, or keep repeating the same old words. But if the hunt goes well, you return home with a bountiful game. Those insights you've gathered can now be slowly prepared and used over weeks, months, or even years. For instance, in 2017, I ventured to Peru, where I went through 11 ayahuasca ceremonies. The experience turned out to be so rich and multi-faceted that I'm still unpacking that gift to this day.

Reflection is a journey everyone must undertake on their own. Yet, the benefits are significantly greater when someone else is by your side. For instance, in a ​recent episode​, Professor Andrew Huberman discussed research on treating post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) using MDMA. It was proven that MDMA alone doesn't cure PTSD. However, when combined with talk therapy, it led to ​67% of people​ no longer meeting the criteria for PTSD after treatment. It's no wonder that in 2017, the FDA granted MDMA-assisted psychotherapy the status of a "breakthrough therapy" for PTSD.

So, what does another person bring to your reflection, whether it's a doctor, shaman, or psychoanalyst? Among other things, their primary function is to create a safe environment for your boldest experiments. This way, you achieve a favorable optionality when encountering novelty. In other words, your risks decrease, and the gifts you receive are more than you can carry.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Recipe for Mental Health by Alexander Lyadov

"A healthy self approaches life through the lenses of agency and gratitude," said psychiatrist Dr. Paul Conti in a recent ​interview​. In other words, regardless of age, status, or the complexity of circumstances, people tend to be happier with their lives when they can shape their circumstances and appreciate what they have. Agency is a powerful concept, which can also mean autonomy, independence, self-inclusion, and self-relatability. Dr. Conti emphasizes that agency and gratitude should not be seen as mere emotional states but as "verbs." You need to build your 'muscles' of empowerment and thankfulness by practicing them every day. Why?

Otherwise, a person becomes a passive victim. Life happens to him (or her), and he doesn't shape it. This powerlessness leads to resentment, jealousy, hatred, and a desire for revenge against those who seem luckier. Thus an inert person turns an objectively bad situation into an unbearable hell for everyone, including himself.. On the contrary, every inch of freedom taken from circumstance fills his life with precious meaning.

The problem with ingratitude isn't just that a person cuts off their support network with others. They deprive themselves of fortunate opportunities because they devalue everything that fate has given them. Moreover, gratitude helps shift the focus away from oneself and onto others, fostering collaborative creativity. Cicero wisely said, "Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others." By the way, Dr. Conti's recipe for mental health (agency and gratitude) echoes another wise person's recipe that I ​recently shared​: to labor and to love.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Speak Up by Alexander Lyadov

The democratization of media has handed each of us a super lever.

It doesn't require anyone's permission, and it's absolutely free.

It would seem, build your expert brand and promote your business.

But some founders hesitate to speak and write publicly.

They say, "I'm not wise, famous, or successful enough yet."

The subtext: "My publications won't be of much value to people."

I reply, "That's not for you to decide. Let Mr. Market figure it out."

The problem here is that people are excessively focused on themselves

It's a subtle form of pride when the ego demands guarantees and control.

They believe their ideas are both brilliant and insignificant at the same time.

Silence is a way to preserve the first without risking the second.

Of course, it's all a mind game; reality is quite different.

First of all, every founder already has something to say.

Entrepreneurship offers a unique perspective on people and business.

Secondly, lessons of failure are more valuable than success stories.

If there's one thing every founder has in abundance, it's that.

Thirdly, no one can predict how your words will resonate.

Your job is to sow seeds honestly, avoiding rocky soil.

If you've done everything you should, one day, there will be a harvest.

Isn't that how your business once emerged and prospered?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Meaningful Sacrifice by Alexander Lyadov


In a noble endeavor, you invest a lot, and your soul sings along.

But if there’s no benefit, it’s painful to lose even a few cents.

The worst is when scammers take advantage of your kindness.

Here, the meaning doesn’t just vanish; it gets a negative sign.

Hence, the sum of your expenses is not that important.

What truly matters is the answer to the question: “For what purpose?”

Friends, family, and authorities won’t help you here.

Why? Because meaning is inherently personal.

Remember this if you’re unsure about parting with something of value.

That something could be your effort, time, money, or assumptions.

The sacrifice must be worth it, your doubts suggest.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

P.S. What do you not regret, even though you paid a high price for it?


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Solidifying Transformation by Alexander Lyadov

"Thank you. You're absolutely right. Your reports are like fine brandy. A year or two down the road, they only get more valuable," a client replied to my analytical report. It's heartening to hear that because I've poured a lot of effort into it. If a transformation session lasts a day, writing the report takes up to two, or even three days.

You'd think the main action happens when we work on the client's request together. During the session, we jot down insights on the whiteboard and in notebooks, capture successful graphs and diagrams in photos. As the name suggests, a transformation occurs during the session with the client. At the very least, we manage to loosen his (or her) familiar worldview. That's when the seeds of new ideas find fertile ground. Ideally, the founder starts seeing himself and his business in an entirely different light. Even if he attempts to go back to their old ways, he can't unsee this new perspective. It's like briefly turning on the light in a dark room – now sooner or later, you'll find your way out.

However, the more significant the transformation, the harder it is to grasp what exactly has happened to you. You need to build a conceptual bridge between your old and new states. That's why, for instance, we want to rewatch videos of remarkable events over and over again. And I revisit notes from books that blew my mind every year. Each time, the resolution improves, much like loading a large image file on a computer.

The process resembles analog photography, where, after developing the photographic materials, you need a fixing solution. Otherwise, under visible light after a while, the image turns entirely black. In business therapy, the report plays the role of the fixer. It describes how and why you've transformed from state A to state B, and whaе held you back. So, it doesn't surprise me when clients say, "You know, I read your report from last year, and suddenly I realized that...". The seed planted long ago not only grew into a tree but continues to bear fruit.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Empathy's Paradox by Alexander Lyadov

To empathetic folks, talking about safeguarding their boundaries can be tough.

When they say "No," it's as if they're castrating another person.

Their caring hearts naturally want to embrace, understand, and warm everyone.

The issue is that there's just one heart, and millions crave its warmth.

Without sensing their own limits, empaths burn out, slowly but surely.

But this isn't the end of the story.

Inevitably, resentment simmers in their hearts due to injustice.

All this time, he (or she) secretly hoped someone would notice his pain.

Unfortunately, no one cried out, "You're ruining him. Leave him in peace!"

So gradually, the kind heart transforms into something quite bitter.

This bewilders him because he never saw himself as mean.

The misconception lies in believing in pure goodness without a hint of evil.

In the Yin and Yang symbol, they'd paint all the black completely white.

But without contrast, white blends into the background and loses its meaning.

Without maintained boundaries, one's identity dissolves like a jellyfish in the sun.

The paradox is that a drop of evil allows good to exist.

For instance, a fierce guard dog successfully protects the sheep from wolves.

Distrust and aggression towards enemies, but obedience to the owner.

Without the shepherd dog, the owner's kind heart becomes a delicacy

So what happens when there's a strong boundary defender within?

Love for deserving people becomes more genuine and profound.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.


Maturity Over Metrics by Alexander Lyadov

When I meet a client, one thing matters most to me.

It's not the size of the business.

Not the industry.

Not the growth potential.

Not the fame of the founder.

And not his (or her) willingness to pay for my work.

The main thing is the maturity of his request on a scale from 1 to 10.

From 1 to 5 – it's a waste of time, nerves, and energy for both of us.

You can pick an unripe green fruit from the tree, but why bother?

A request from 6 to 8 must be kindled like a fire in a damp forest.

Real work only happens with a request from 9 to 10.

The client turned to me because he has nowhere else to go.

He's been wrestling with a stubborn problem for so long that he eventually merged with it.

The paradox is that feeling at the bottom, he is just a step away from the heavens.

We don't care about conventions because we're concerned with function, not form.

We are so in sync that the efficiency of our work approaches 100%.

In that moment, everything is at its peak: trust, value, and meaning.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander


You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.