Test of Time /  by Alexander Lyadov

Certainly, in business, instant feedback is crucial. It helps fix mistakes and amplify strengths.

But sometimes, delayed feedback over many years is worth more. For time filters out the superfluous and crystallizes the essential.

Example: A former colleague wrote in a LinkedIn comment:

"Disregarding the industry, you have always been a great example of a people manager to me. After almost 20 years in my career, I can confirm this word by word. I wish you were managing people further."

I warmly remember our time working together. The struggle to find talented and unconventional team members. The selection of bold and ambitious clients. Safeguarding an atmosphere where creating Wow-products felt natural. Encouraging extra efforts for results. Not hesitating to spend company money on books, gifts, unique parties, and birthday celebrations.

But I also recall my doubts: "What if this isn't important or needed by anyone? What if I'm doing all of this in vain?" After all, it wasn't about buying office supplies but intangible things.

Though I often made mistakes, globally, I turned out to be right. Yes, we created groundbreaking projects back then. But more importantly, the experience of co-creation transformed each of us. That's unforgettable.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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16 Angry Men /  by Alexander Lyadov

Sixteen strangers stared at me in tense anticipation. I got invited to moderate a strategic session. In reality, there was a brewing conflict within the company. But no one dared to label it as such. De facto, I became a business mediator.

Conflict is an extremely unstable thing. The more people involved, the higher the chance of an explosion. So agreeing to this project may sound like madness or adventure.

In my defense, other moderators declined. However, there was something about these folks that appealed to me, so I wanted to help them. Eventually, I convinced myself it was a professional challenge.

In such situations, a solid foundation is crucial – you've got to start right.

First, I asked participants to take a few minutes to individually write their response to the question, "What irritates, confuses, or worries me the most in the company?"

Each person voiced their points, and I listened intently, asking deeper questions. Some needed encouragement to speak, while others needed timely restraint. At the same time, I had to calm down the 'opponents' eager to convey their 'truth.'

At the end of this exercise, the atmosphere in the room noticeably changed. People relaxed, smiles appeared, and a sense of excitement emerged.

But why, when it was like touching an open wound with our hands?

1. Implicit things became explicit. The conflict was named a conflict. People voiced all their fears. This reduced the uncertainty.

2. I demonstrated a different way of communication and its benefits. People realized that if I could do it, they could too.

3. For the first time, everyone felt genuinely heard. The urge to fight and prove a point vanished.

4. It turned out the "opponents" had a meaningful position too. Moreover, their initial intentions were good.

5. It became clear that despite differences in approaches, everyone globally wanted to achieve a very similar state.

With such a strong foundation, the rest of the session went great.

Notice, the problems and solutions were within them.

I was just a catalyst for changes they needed long ago.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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Negative Spiral /  by Alexander Lyadov

Opened a bunch of YouTube videos about American cops' work.

A chest camera captures how a trivial thing turns into drama.

Let's say the driver could take the speeding ticket and calmly go about his business. But life would be unbearably dull, right?

Instead, the driver gets irritated, insults the cop, and flaunts his rights. He ​refuses​ to show ID and ​threatens​ to pull strings. The conflict escalates right before our eyes.

In one case, a guy suddenly decides to ​make a run​ for it. In another, a woman flat out ​refuses​ to get out of the car. In a third, they bite and kick the cops. Drugs or weapons are found in the car, and the wrongdoing geometrically multiplies. Even when the police, parents, and friends try to calm him down, the person digs himself deeper. Out of all the available scenarios, for some reason, he chooses the worst. It's not bad luck or fate; it's more like stubborn self-destruction.

There's a temptation to smirk and say, "What fools!" But looking at ourselves honestly, we'll remember doing something similar. Maybe it didn't have the same intensity, but the pattern of worsening the situation was there.

It's evident that any unpleasant situation a person can easily turn into hell. Then, this means that he can potentially improve anything.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
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Imperfection Is Ideal /  by Alexander Lyadov

Every advertising pro knows the "crocodile in the corner".

It's all about not presenting the perfect design to the client.

There's a risk the client will declare, "Everything needs to change."

They feel compelled to make some comment.

After all, perfection is unattainable, so a flaw must be found at any cost.

As a result, cool ideas get messed up, deadlines get broken, and so on.

The designer tackles this issue by slipping in an element of obvious nonsense. It could be:

  • A mistake in the date of the advertised event,

  • A neighboring Pantone hue in corporate logo,

  • A missed client comment from the last meeting, etc.

The critic's gaze immediately hooks onto the loop of imperfection.

"What the #@?! Get rid of this! The rest is fine," everyone exhales.

But this approach is also useful when it comes to yourself.

Otherwise, you, like that client, can harm yourself.

Try taking the next step consciously "imperfect."

In other words, it's a "draft," not the "final product."

Furthermore, this approach is often closer to the truth.

"Work in progress" perfectly describes who we are and what we do.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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Time to Be Yourself /  by Alexander Lyadov

They say: There's no point in therapy, coaching, or mentoring.

Like, business partners, spouses, and friends will offer any help you need.

Sure, mutual support acts like an insurance policy. You help them, they help you. It's unlikely that everyone around you will fall into depression or go broke at the same time.

You could also argue whether a coach has enough experience to give you the best advice. After all, with some effort, you can find an expert for any question. But there are reasons I've been seeing a therapist for 5 years.

I know for sure that this hour will be entirely devoted to me. Focusing on the other person, forgetting about yourself—it's a rare skill most of our acquaintances don't have. I've studied it myself for a few years, so I know.

Moreover, each session has explicit settings. Motivation, roles, and responsibilities for each of us are clarified. For example, I don't have to worry about whether I owe something for insights or whether it's convenient to bring up a problem again.

And I love that during this hour, I can be myself. It's possible only when, on one hand, you're not afraid to open up and become completely vulnerable. And on the other hand, you're not afraid to shatter the interlocutor with the "horrors" you carry inside.

Imagine this: on top of everything I've mentioned, you also sense genuine interest and warmth from the therapist. This experience alone has the power to transform you.

Do you have someone to share with what you can't tell anyone else?

By the way, which of the three illustrations do you think is the best?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

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Jumping Into the Void /  by Alexander Lyadov

Changes always come with discomfort, confusion, and pain.

That's why a chain of small, steady changes is ideal.

But sometimes life pushes us to the edge of our familiar world.

Ahead looms a frightening uncertainty.

You realize the real risk of crashing or losing your mind.

For love or money, no one can do it for you.

You must take the leap into the void personally.

That's when the miracle happens in mid-air — metamorphosis.

You jump as one person, but land as someone else.

...

The context, scale, and significance of the leap vary for each of us.

But there's a common rule to avoid unnecessary suffering on the edge.

You need to quickly find your own meaning on the other side.

The kind of meaning that redeems everything you'll be facing.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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The Outfit /  by Alexander Lyadov

If you haven't seen the movie "Outfit" yet, I envy you.

Accidentally turning it on, I couldn't tear myself away. A few times, I thought I had it all figured out. But the storyteller would suddenly shift the perspective, and everything would appear in a new light.

Besides, the movie offered a business insight. The quote below from the film illustrates the stance that any Master of their Craft should take.

The gist of it is, even though clients come to you with a problem and pay money, you're accountable not to them but to those above you.

Call it conscience, professional integrity, or God. Thanks to an inner impulse, you do not what the client may want, but what the situation here and now demands.

Some years ago, a customer comes into my shop with a suit, not one of mine.

The customer says, “The jacket, it's too big”. It is.

“The problem”, I say, “is the shoulders”.

But the customer says, no, he likes the shoulders. The problem is the sleeves.

We go back and forth.

Finally, the customer says, “It's my money, and I'm telling you, cut the sleeves”.

So, what do I do?

I say: “Yes, sir”, and then I cut the shoulders.

The customer, he comes back, tries on his new suit.

“It's perfect, he says. “That's exactly what I asked for”.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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Master Your Kingdom /  by Alexander Lyadov

Scaling is a big temptation for an entrepreneur. It seems like you just need to pour more resources into the company.

But investments, like lenses, magnify not only its strengths but also its weaknesses. So, all the horsepower of a "Ferrari" turns into a curse if a novice sits behind the wheel.

For instance, glitches emerge when expanding the team. While the business is small, the owner compensates for the flaws in the business model with his (or her) own resources. Unfortunately, hired workers aren't inclined to go the extra mile like him. The more of them, the more the company wobbles.

In such cases, I advise clients to go back to basics. Together, we recall how this business first emerged. If you can ask and listen, you unveil its "DNA." What the founder dreamt of and how he or she created value points to the ideal that has dimmed over time.

You need to separate the signal from the noise. Then understand how to preserve it and manage it. Only then can you truly start scaling your business. Remember: control first, then growth.

"You must be the Master of your own Kingdom," ​said​ director Guy Ritchie. History has examples where a king found himself in exile and had to prove his right to the crown again.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you feel like the owner of your kingdom?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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Your Business North Star /  by Alexander Lyadov

Many founders experience a moment of disorientation:

  • Employees add to problems instead of solving them,

  • Revenue is up, but profit remains elusive,

  • Hiring someone to fix it all is tempting,

  • Day-to-day grind consumes all attention,

  • Passion and strategic projects take a backseat,

  • The founder feels the drift, and so on.

In those situations, I often share a metaphor with clients. Take jiu-jitsu, for example, with its empirical wisdom. Imagine you're tangled in the chaos of a match, feeling lost. What to do? Straighten up and look up. Immediately, a reliable axis emerges.

In business, customer orientation serves as that axis. Remember how it all began. It was just you and your first customer. You were hungry, energetic, ready to solve their problem – not the one they described, but the real one.

As you succeeded, the customer returned, praised you, and recommended you to others. Meanwhile, you sought tools to make your value skyrocket in their eyes. Thus came the team, contractors, procedures, and systems.

Everything seemed fine, but at some point, the company forgot why it existed. Every product, department, or employee acted like the center of the universe. The business stopped being for the customers; it started closing in on itself. A closed system collapses, and people lose their minds. No wonder the founder feels bad at that moment.

What's the way out?

Face the customers—your business will improve on its own.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
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"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
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Creating Myself /  by Alexander Lyadov

There are many areas of knowledge where I'm completely clueless.

Yet, globally, no one pulls off what I do.

Does it sound cocky? Not at all.

To grab my skills, one needs to follow my odd journey:

  • Chemist-analyst

  • Advertising man

  • Entrepreneur

  • Wealth manager

  • Venture capitalist

  • Business therapist...

I've switched professional IDs more than once. But beyond biz, I've gathered diverse experiences—be it creativity, travel, or sports.

Every time, I plunged headfirst into a new activity. Genuine curiosity guided me. That's why learning happened very fast.

Couldn't predict every twist, but now, looking back, "connecting the dots" is easy. By exploring different disciplines, I was essentially exploring myself.

For my current passion, none of the existing names suited. That's why I had to make it up. A business therapist is a synthesis of a peculiar mix of ingredients. But each of them was essential.

What was your journey like to get to where you are now?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
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"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
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Flames of Transformation /  by Alexander Lyadov

What's the value of your ideas and products for customers? A savvy entrepreneur recently reminded me of the value of mine.

According to her, it's my thirst for the work of entrepreneurs who make daily decisions "on the edge of the abyss." This interest gives me a deeper understanding of their goals, needs, and context.

Indeed, the phenomenon of entrepreneurship intrigues me like fire did to primitive humans. I'm eager to grasp its nature. It radiates a power capable of transforming everything.

It transforms mundane lead into gold, in alchemical terms. People will call it a "unique opportunity" later on. For now, the founder picks up "useless" things lying on the ground.

Yet, in alchemy, both external and internal processes mattered. By solving the mysteries of matter, man himself has been transformed. The fire melts both iron and the blacksmith.

Somehow I see this flame in entrepreneurs. Its energy charges me with realistic optimism. As long as these wonderful people are among us, we'll tame absobloodylutely any chaos.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
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"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
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The One Who Creates /  by Alexander Lyadov

Building a business is a lot like writing an article.

The most difficult thing is to weave a text pattern from the threads of the void. This stage is unpredictable; sheer willpower or technique won't snatch it. Sometimes inspiration comes instantly, and other times it takes hours of struggling.

You must connect with something beyond your control. The more unique your final product, the more this metaphysical force gets involved. You are merely a tool in its hands.

Yet, once the rough draft is ready, a different task begins. For analysis and revisions, you need logic, procedure, and algorithms.

The editing, publishing, and distribution stage is crucial too. But it's technical and predictable. Anyone can be taught to do it.

That's why there are always fewer entrepreneurs and writers than managers and editors. We should recognize and respect this hierarchy. No matter how strange, unpredictable, and arduous the creative phase may be, it makes everything we have today.

Fortunately, creators cannot not create. It's also the only thing they'll do full time. So, administrators, financiers, and marketers are as essential to a creator as air. Thus, an alliance forms, transforming the world.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
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Magic Moves /  by Alexander Lyadov

There's no other way to describe it—​pure magic​.

Imagine a wizard proposing a deal: "Want to slash the chances of cardiovascular-related death by ​50%​ and cancer-related death by 40%?" You're excited and ask, "But what's the catch?" The wizard reassures you: "Just 9 minutes of exercise a day."

For instance, right now, stand up from your desk and do 20-30 squats, jumps, or "burpees" for a few minutes. In the city, take the stairs instead of the elevator, jog instead of walking, or have a call with a client on the go.

Exercise snacks tackle modern problems.

First, ditch the guilt of long desk hours. A quick exercise snack speeds up your heartbeat, gets your blood pumping, and lets you break a tiny sweat.

Second, no need for fancy gear or a gym membership.

Third, anyone can spare a few minutes a day.

Seems like a good deal to me. What do you think?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

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Embrace the Suck /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

"Discipline is doing what you hate to do, but do it like you love it." ​Tyson's words ​resonate with every athlete striving for lofty goals.

Your personality has many parts. Sometimes they want different things. One is already tired upon waking, desiring to laze in bed with a book all day. Another dreams of becoming a champion, but right away, not after several years. The third quietly packs a gym bag.

Sometimes, those parts can block each other, entering a deadlock. Then you can't move at all. You can suppress any part with violence, but only once. Later, that part will go underground and take revenge on you.

It's wiser to introduce a new law that makes sense for all parts of your personality, even if in the long run. The idea of preserving life is close and understandable to everyone. Then, make the law a habit through repeated ritual. Example: Physical activity can be anything but sweaty and daily.

However, the highest skill is transforming poison into medicine. As American Navy Seals motivate themselves: "Embrace the suck." Sincerely love what you hate the most. For me, it's:

  • Leg workouts,

  • Doing static exercises,

  • Morning jiu-jitsu bouts,

  • Immersing in an icy bath,

  • Repeating actions multiple times,

  • Being stuck in a vulnerable position,

  • Feeling like a "fool" in a new area, and so on.

Tyson's turnaround from hate to love is complex. But every time you manage it, the feeling of super strength inside you grows.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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Gotta Ride It Out /  by Alexander Lyadov

There were times when things got tough in our PE/VC investment fund:

  • After getting the money, the founder failed to keep his promises.

  • Losing projects to us, rivals played dirty with criminal ties.

  • We parted ways with our fund CFO, and we still haven't found a replacement.


During those times, my business partner always repeated his signature line:

"Just gotta ride it out."

I found that perspective irritating, but in the end, he was right.

No one threw in the towel. Instead, we rolled up our sleeves and worked round the clock for a while, enduring the sharp discomfort. But sooner or later, the wave of problems always subsided.

A friend who's into surfing also told me that when you fall off the board, don't panic—stay composed. The goal is to stretch your oxygen supply and avoid smashing your head. Eventually, the wave weakens, and it lets go. Then you'll know which way to resurface.

Some problems have this quirk: time beats them. Like engaging in a grapple with an aggressive bodybuilder, endure his push for 2-3 minutes. After that, he slackens, and you can submit him.

In this sense, if you do everything in your power, time is on your side.

Be patient.

Just gotta ride it out.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
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"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
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Turn Adversity into Triumph /  by Alexander Lyadov

Falling into water, a person starts sinking.

Tripping, you begin to fall.

When an adversary tightens my throat, I gasp and want to tap.

In every case, some dark force tries to harm the victim.

There appears to be no other interpretation. Right?

In reality, the situation is as you see it.

And your perception depends on your (often hidden) beliefs.

You've gathered them throughout your life: family, books, and experiences.

Beliefs can impose limitations and distort what you see.

Fortunately, by reevaluating our beliefs, we see a different world.

Turns out, we can rely on the density of water to swim. Without its resistance, strokes, and pushes would be impossible.

Mastering the skill of micro-falls, a kid will confidently walk. 'Destructive' gravity will help him achieve any goal.

By squeezing my throat, my jiujitsu opponent got stuck and became rigid, hence vulnerable. I put my feet against him, flipped him over, and won.

Thus, the choice of 'good or harm?' is within us, not somewhere else.

To paraphrase Goethe, our aim is to turn that power that eternally wills evil to eternally do good.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

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Own Your Experience /  by Alexander Lyadov

Underneath me, the pines rustled and swayed. Ahead, an endless horizon stretched out. My body turned cottony, and my stomach knotted up. A thought spun in my head: "One step separates me from..." It felt like in a few moments I'd be ready to bungee jump.

Suddenly, someone nearby shouted, "Ready?" and without waiting for my answer, commanded, "Five... four... three... two... one... Go!" My mind had time to protest, but my body had already taken the leap into the void.

Later, friends congratulated me, but I was really mad. Maybe the bungee staff wanted to help, have fun, or just go home. Unfortunately, they stole my jump.

So, the next morning, I went back and leaped again. This time, I warned them that I'd be up there as long as I needed. When the moment arrived, I confidently jumped. With every fiber, I felt freedom, meaning, and joy. This experience was 100% mine.

Over 22 years have passed since then, but I remember that lesson. It's easy to succumb to threats or temptations and do what someone (external or internal) wants you to do. Yes, formally, you'll achieve and gain accolades. But can you honestly say you did it? And if not, whose life are you living—yours or someone else's?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

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Freedom Battle Within /  by Alexander Lyadov

For freedom, one must fight. Even within oneself. There's so much to do, commitments pulling you every which way.

Seems like gaining freedom once and for all is impossible. Our minds are stuck in these fragile bodies, existing in a chaotic world. But beyond the body, there are personal aspects demanding, "Why hesitate?! Dive into X! Why haven't you done Y yet?"

Give them a chance, and internal critics will nag you to a pulse loss. These voices seem like they belong to a paranoid, a wicked teacher, or a stuck algorithm. Their demands have a meaning for them, but love for you is absent. In 99 out of 100 cases, their screams and whines are useless.

No, it's not conscience. The latter usually whispers faintly, gazes meaningfully, or stays silent, blushing. Compared to the critics, conscience is easier to ignore or drown out.

To stay sane and not burn out, find a way to shut your critics up, slam the door in their faces, and put up a sign saying, "We're closed." For instance, my critics are speechless when:

  • I'm in an ice bath,

  • I'm doing jiu-jitsu,

  • I'm helping a client,

  • I'm writing an article,

  • I feel connected to the person I am talking to.

That is, whenever I'm nowhere else but in the present.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

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Secret Knowledge /  by Alexander Lyadov

All we know today are not truths but merely models.

We use them because:

  1. They are helpful,

  2. We're all used to them,

  3. We haven't got anything better yet.

A map, like any model, is a limited representation of the terrain. Sure, you can navigate by it, but no smells, traps, or snakes.

Question: Do you know the limitations of a particular model? Often, that answer decides loss or victory, life or death.

Everyone is eager to teach you their models. But seldom does anyone specify that this is by no means a dogma and that there are exceptions 1, 2, and 3.

That's why an educated person sometimes turns out more vulnerable than a novice. The illusion of knowledge makes them careless.

It is your responsibility to learn when Model X is no longer useful, akin to conceiving a child or packing a parachute.

The bonus is that such knowledge can be considered secret because:

  • It gives you an invisible lever,

  • Where others see a hardship, you see an opportunity,

  • What horrifies others fills your heart with hope.

"The young man knows the rules, but the old man knows the exceptions," said the American physician, poet, and writer Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

But, you and I won't wait for old age to become wiser, will we?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Your Ego or Your Life? /  by Alexander Lyadov

Life gets a whole lot simpler when the stakes are sky-high. The brink of disaster makes us value function over form.

Whether it's a sinking ship, an earthquake, or a fire, the essence remains the same:

Survival comes first; the rest can wait.

So, in chaos, the real MVP is the one who:

  1. keeps their cool,

  2. knows what to do,

  3. gives clear-cut orders.

But what's with you? Bothered by a commanding tone? Cringing at the roughness of the words? Itching to protest? Longing for more respect?

Alas, it means you haven't quite grasped the predicament you're in.

Otherwise, you'd willingly turn a blind eye to trivial matters:

  • Politeness is optional for a mountain rescuer.

  • Exterior is secondary for a guard dog.

  • A cardio surgeon can be an atheist or a Seventh-day Adventist.

  • A person gasping for air will take oxygen in any form.

Extreme situations test our maturity. Reality forces the proud to make a tough choice: Your Ego or Your Life.

The Wolf : Boys, get to work.

Vincent : A please would be nice.

The Wolf : Get it straight buster - I'm not here to say please, I'm here to tell you what to do and if self-preservation is an instinct you possess you'd better fucking do it and do it quick. I'm here to help - if my help's not appreciated then lotsa luck, gentlemen.

Vincent : I don't mean any disrespect, I just don't like people barking orders at me.

The Wolf : If I'm curt with you it's because time is a factor. I think fast, I talk fast and I need you guys to act fast if you wanna get out of this. So, pretty please... with sugar on top. Clean the fucking car.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.