Symptom vs. Cause / March 12, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Helping someone get rid of their issues is tough. It's way simpler to temporarily ease their pain. Just prescribe some painkillers, disguise the consequences, or entertain them.

Just like after Prosecco, everything feels lighter, safer, and more fun. Sadly, a few hours later, drowsiness kicks in. Or a brutal hangover if that heavenly state was fueled by whiskey and wine.

In business, group strategy sessions and team training often serve the same purpose as Botox or a new haircut in life. There's usually no systemic improvement, just a cosmetic effect. Why?

The conditions for transformation aren't ripe yet. Because the focus is shifted.

The founder should get sick and tired of this "Groundhog Day." Pain relievers only push him deeper into a dead end. He'll desperately seek a way out.

Why couldn't anyone help him? The problem is an integral part of his lifestyle. The latter is based on beliefs. Not everyone is ready to question them.

One day, you decide: "I am the root cause of all my problems." You become the origin. Following you, your business begins to improve on its own.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

How can I help you?
If you've long been trying to understand what is limiting you and/or your business and how to finally give important changes a push, then The Catalyst Session is designed specifically for you. Book it here.

Body's Secret / March 11, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Body is the great equalizer. It doesn't matter if you're a dude or a lady, young or old, living in Kinshasa or New York, saving pennies or indulging every whim.

Everyone must care about their own body. You can't delegate that.

Sure, there are muscle stimulators, massage chairs, and those "lazy man" exercise machines. Dieticians, cosmetologists, and plastic surgeons promise miracles. And supplements and drugs abound on the internet.

Seems like you could just place an order and chill while the magic happens. But, at best, the effect of such help is superficial and fleeting. At worst, a person gains nothing, losing even what they had. Illusions are paid with a microcredit interest.

Why don't people want to pay attention to their bodies? Some see their bodies as annoying appendages to their magnificent brains. Others were never taught to endure discomfort. The rest quietly replay their parents' fate, where sports only happened on TV.

Ah, if only they saw profound meaning in caring for their bodies!

Fortunate are those who've discovered the "Body Secret." Insights, experiences, skills, and transformations rarely enter the mind directly. The body is the key to everything. Often, you have to start with the body to change your whole life.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

The Best of All Worlds / March 10, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Bird soars in the sky. Fish swims in the river. One environment is vastly different from another. It's no wonder their inhabitants try not to cross the border. The bird doesn't want to drown, and the fish - to suffocate.

But what if someone decides to study a foreign environment? Of course, it will never become native to them. Yet, in exchange for curiosity and patience, the explorer will receive a generous reward.

Example: osprey. Weight up to 2 kg, wingspan up to 170 cm. Unlike other birds of prey, its diet is 99% fish. The osprey hovers above the water, then, with its feet forward, swiftly plunges into the water. Dives are successful in 24-74 cases out of 100.

Narrow specialization has developed a series of morphological features:

Longer legs, claws convex and curved.
The outer toe turns backward for catching slippery fish.
One leg holds the fish in front, and one behind for aerodynamics.
Feathers have a greasy water-repellent structure.
Nasal valves protect nostrils from water ingress.

The osprey has learned to survive on the border of worlds. That's how it takes the best from all. The land provides the security of the nest, the air offers the freedom of flight, the water supplies an abundance of food without competition.

How to achieve stable prosperity in business? Some hire McKinsey, others go to Harvard, and the third buy the Top 100 business books. But all you need is to look at the world around you in a new way.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

The Problems We Choose / March 9, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Have you ever had a doctor feed you the right but empty words? He talks to an abstract illness, not to you as an individual. Those "experts" will soon be out of a job, thanks to AI.

You don't need knowledge in general; you need solutions that will sprout in the soil of your life. What you complain about didn't happen by chance. Even a harmful habit tries to fill some deficit.

So, the doctor's ultimatum: "You need to stop doing X" is nonsense if activity X fills your life with meaning every day. Yes, injuries are bad, but the existential vacuum is much scarier.

Find a professional who sees the world as it is—complex, ambivalent, and dynamic. If they genuinely care about you, their advice will be insightful and applicable here and now.

For instance, my neurologist, jokingly scolds me at every visit: "Oh, that Lyadov again." But then he philosophically notes, "Problems are inevitable. Active sports lead to one set of problems. A sedentary lifestyle leads to others."

I choose jiu-jitsu, kettlebells, and maces, and then try to avoid getting hurt. But when injuries happen, I always go to the same specialist. And it's obvious why.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Don't Look Askance at Obliques / March 8, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Before us stands a physiology professor, bodybuilder, and renowned blogger. Seems like a smart guy. But then he declares:

“Don’t train your obliques. It’s a fucking waste of your time”.

In his logic, your goal is to have an attractive physique. For whom? Probably for the opposite sex, IG followers, and IFBB judges.

Yet, all of them focus on appearance, forgetting the essence that birthed it. They are driven by whim, not the question: “What for?”.

Modern IG athletes are like German shepherds. The latter were so actively bred to win in external shows that the breed degenerated. Now, they don’t use these “beauties“ for protection; they go for the tough Malinois.

Oblique abdominal muscles are present in the body not by chance. Yes, there’s no need for them when posing on stage or flirting on the beach.

But if you need to lift a 19” wheel or throw an opponent in grappling, oblique muscles are just as crucial as the back and abs. No wonder lower back pain is the modern folks’ scourge.

Judging statues, ancient Greeks didn’t worry about beefed-up obliques ruining their look:

Maybe peace and war set different standards in society? No, rather, trials bring us back to reality as it is.

The seasoned stormtrooper advised, "Guys, work on your backs and legs."

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Mismatch / March 7, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Let's say you stumbled upon a rock. Did it intend to harm you? Nope. Your paths crossed by chance. No one's at fault.

In business, a similar scenario is perceived differently. The CEO suspects a saboteur among top managers. He tears into every idea, plants seeds of doubt among colleagues— in short, he hurts the company in every way.

But in 99 out of 100 cases, the manager has no ill intentions. More likely, he genuinely wants your company to thrive.

But hold on, why on earth is he throwing a wrench in the works?

Most likely, he's simply not on the same page as you. He passionately approaches a future, which is foreign to you as a CEO. Both of you want the company's good, but you have Good X, and he has Good Y.

How did it come to this? There was a glitch in the hiring process. No one asked, "Our company is multiplying X. Are you interested or not?" Without that, friction and conflicts are inevitable.

Guessed the root cause already? Nobody in the company talks about X, despite office slogans and PowerPoints. Only the founder/CEO knows, but sadly, he keeps mum.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stand up! / March 6, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Anton Eichinger, Till Eulenspiegel, c. 1903

When I feel absobloodylutely low, I turn on stand-up comedy. Not for the laughs that distract me from problems. Quite the opposite.

The comedian paints reality as it is. The higher the skill, the more lifelike the portrayal. Examples: George Carlin, Dave Chappelle, Taylor Tomlinson, Louis C.K, Whitney Cummings and Bill Burr.

But here's the catch. True reality is hard for people to accept. It's like a wildfire. It turns the forest of illusions and prejudices into ashes.

Humor comes to the rescue. Like an anesthetic, it numbs the pain. The "operation" goes smoother. In this sense, the comedian is a diagnostician, an anesthesiologist, and a surgeon all at once.

Moreover, often the comedian is also a patient. Before our eyes, they reveal themselves with a scalpel, fixing one organ after another. By the way, many admit that stand-up is the best therapy.

The key is that the comedian shows how to deal with the "fire." What's needed: vigilance, curiosity, audacity, and honesty. Such behavior inspires. You think, "He did it. So, I can too!"

After watching the show, a miracle happens. Energy emerges. Can't wait to dive into work. And the problem shrinks in size. You are standing up.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Magic Lamp / March 5, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

We snagged this lamp as a keepsake in the gingerbread-style Casa Batlló. Gaudí's genius shines in everything, from the exterior down to the doorknobs. A stroll through El Gòtic, a whiff of sea breeze, and Barcelona captures my heart forever. Back then, we were young, carefree and happy.

Wanted to haul Barcelona's symbol home. The snag? The lamp's delicate and unwieldy. Carrying it, no way. What if I shatter it? Plus, it was pricey.

Yet, intuition whispered: "You won't regret it. Hang tight." And, of course, she was right. 13 years on, every evening, I enjoy its enchanting glow. The lamp reminds me of paradise.

What we hold dear hardly ever comes easy. Goes for small stuff and grand projects alike. Sacrifice comes first — be it a moment of discomfort or years of struggle.

But it's all in the denominator. Not important. We need to focus on the numerator. That answers the question: "For what?" Personal meaning can justify any, even colossal, cost.

Remember, meaning doesn't always scream in neon on the wall. Often, it's a vague sensation in your gut. A pull somewhere. Where? Can't be explained. Yet. But later, you'll thank intuition greatly.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

The Music Box with a Secret / March 4, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Beloved childhood cartoon - "The Music Box with a Secret."

As an adult, I revisited it and appreciated it even more.

In 1976, especially in the USSR, it stood out from the rest:

Psychedelic aesthetics akin to the Beatles' "Yellow Submarine,"
Electronic music and advanced sound effects,
Profound meaning and a dynamic plot.

A boy falls asleep and finds himself inside an ancient music box. It's frozen. He tries to find the reason for its malfunction.

Various parts of the box boast about their importance. A jesting harlequin argues with them. He knows the secret - one small detail decides whether the box will function or not.

But they all mockingly say, "There's no secret. You're just an extra part. We won't miss you."

The jester is outraged: "Extra"? "Not needed"? Without me, you're just junk! If this thing breaks, the box won't make a sound!" He shifts the pawl that locks the gear. Collapse follows.

The same plot constantly unfolds in business.

In a company, it seems like everyone forgot why they gathered. Every top manager flaunts their merits in the CEO's eyes. Departments sabotage each other. There is no profit, even if there is revenue growth.

There's division, friction, and local optimization. No one names the problems. Efforts to honestly assess the situation are thwarted. Arrogance and fear are a dangerous mix.

Such an attitude hinders finding the root cause of problems. Suppose an external expert points out, "Here it is - the key detail!" That's not enough.T o secure progress, you must know "Where to?" and "For what?"

Only one person can provide these answers - the founder/CEO.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Life at the Intersection / March 3, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

The most interesting stuff happens at the junction, intersection, and twist.

For instance, a moment before waking up, I sometimes get insights.

It's like a micro-satori. Suddenly, a long-pondered "koan" gets resolved.

Why does the hunch refuse to come before or after?

In the daytime, the mind rules despotically, but at night, it's a captive of the subconscious.

A new thought struggles to breach the fortress walls of logic. Or it wanders the halls of a splendid castle, yet its master is not there.

A fortunate opportunity is the transition from sleep to wakefulness. A crack appears in the monolith of existence. And novelty seeps through.

Such junctions occur in our lives more often than we think. Sometimes by our initiative, but more often by the whims of circumstance.

Note that each time, the automatism of existence shatters. This means that something you've long needed finally gets a chance to materialize.

Typically, a new thought/decision/action seems peculiar. That's normal. True life is always a paradox.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Piercing Attention / March 2, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

When the air balloon inflates, it's easy to pierce. When the wood is small and dry, starting a fire isn't much trouble either. Otherwise, you'll have to sweat. And in a vacuum, a fire is simply impossible.

The process flows effortlessly when all the prerequisites are in place.

And if you care about the outcome of the process, you'll get it without much effort. Well, almost. Ideally, you just need to be in the right place at the right time. Reality will do the rest for you.

Let's apply this thought to your business. Are you tired of an endless string of problems, glitches, and conflicts? It means you're working against the process.

Friction with reality always causes a burn.

The chaos phase is normal if you've launched a startup. Finding a business model is never comfortable. But if the company has been in the market for a while, its movement is as focused as a bob on a bobsled track.

This means you know exactly who your customers are, when they are ready, and how to create value for them.

So if you're an expert in your field, you need one thing.

Attention. Sharp as a pin.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

(Un)important back / March 1, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

How much time do you spend glued to a desk?

I can’t manage less than 8-10 hours a day.

Unfortunately, such work comes at a cost—a nasty pain in the back.

I’m not alone. 5 out of 10 working adults endure back pain each year. It’s the “popular” reason for chronic pain and the top cause of missed work and disability.

Recently, I had enough. I decided to toughen up my back.

Unlike past futile attempts, here’s what I do now:

Dedicated workouts for the problem area (lower back).
Exercise at least 3-4 times a week.
Invested in a program from orthopedists who fixed my “wrestler’s elbow.”

Thanks to the struggle and kettlebells, I thought I was no slouch. But some exercises I couldn’t do at first. Give a shot to, say, Side Plank Thruster, 3-4 sets for 1 minute each.

Turns out, some of my muscles are embarrassingly weak. They seem unimportant because they don’t stand out like shoulders, chest, or biceps.

The irony is that the stability of your back depends on these inconspicuous muscles. Hence, everything else:

Confidence in daily tasks with a load,
Explosive strength, and mobility,
No missed workouts,
High productivity,
Quality of life, etc.

Truth often hides where we least expect it.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Injury Genesis / February 29, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Guess, what is the main cause of injuries in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu?

I'll tell you right away, it's something different from:

age,
lack of sleep,
loss of focus,
malicious intent,
skipping warm-ups,
not knowing techniques,
a weak coach, and so on.

Hint: The reason is the same as in negotiations or trading stocks.

Moreover, it's a universal source of almost all human woes.

Intrigued? Let me share a typical situation in a grappling match.

Your opponent is strong, but you're no slouch either. You crave victory but fear losing even more. In a backyard cat brawl, the heat is lower than yours. That's how athletes fight for a medal in the Olympic final.

Luck is on your opponent's side, and he pulls off a dangerous move. Your ligaments stretch like a bowstring. Another second, and it would be too late. But you act like a madman: "Tap out? Never!"

Crack! Ouch! Operation, rehab, six months gone.

Now the absurdity of your behavior is clear. You could have "cut your losses" and started the game again. Perhaps you'd figure things out and make your opponent tap a couple of times.

Something hindered, tempted, and drove you crazy. What was it?

Pride. In modern terms, Ego.

Inflated Ego prevents us from accepting reality as it is. We're like the chick valuing the cracked shell more than freedom.

Watch a master at work. He makes mistakes like everyone else, maybe even more often. But the cost is reasonable because he pays ASAP. Reality doesn't charge a compound interest on debt.

Conclusion: our true opponent, Ego, isn't outside but inside.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Multiplying Your Forces / February 28, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

I'm fascinated by nonlinear effects.

A few examples:

A 15-minute afternoon nap refreshes like a 2-hour sleep.
One vice—pride—is the source of most people's problems.
A similar dilemma constrains the growth of different companies.
Controlling an opponent's head in Jiu-Jitsu reduces his power by 80%.

The essence is simple: a tiny change yields a colossal result.

It's a disaster if the nonlinear effect works against you. Standing in the path of an avalanche or mass hysteria makes no sense. One force will soon exhaust itself. The other won't even notice the obstacle.

It's a different story when asymmetry is on your side. You playfully move mountains and rivers. Your initial input doesn't matter if a lever amplifies it by 1,000 times.

So, for example, for a venture investor, early-stage startup valuation is secondary. Whether it's $1M or $5M is trivial when the company has a real chance to be worth $1B in a few years.

The task is to find the non-linear effects and be in sync with them.

I used to think they were a vanishing species, like the white rhinoceros. Turns out, they're everywhere. Sometimes, I even stumble upon them.

It's about optics. You need to slightly adjust your perspective.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Sneakers for $50,000 / February 27, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Would you drop 50 grand on a pair of sneakers?

No? Well, some folks would call that a stroke of luck.

These aren't your run-of-the-mill shoes; we're talking about the Nike SB Dunk Low Paris!

A collab between Nike and French artist Bernard Buffet, these kicks hit the streets back in 2003 for the "White Dunk" mobile art exhibition in Paris. Rumor has it there were only 150-200 pairs.

There was supposed to be a raffle, but guess what? It got canceled. The hype was just too damn high. Sold exclusively in select stores, people camped out in the cold for days, hoping to step into the skate culture paradise.

You might be thinking, "Interesting, but still nuts." Well, yes and no.

See, there's a reality, like a pushpin we sat down on with a yelp. But there's another reality too, and it's all up in people's heads.

If at least two people believe in the value of X, then there is a deal. And what's X? It could be anything—from John Lennon's tooth ($31K) to a bag of air from a Kanye West concert ($60K).

Thinking that every product or service has an objective price is a major misconception in business. There are those who cling to pricing based on what it cost them to make the darn thing.

Sounds reasonable, fair, and in control, right? Well, despite the price talks, what they're really hashing out is the value. The latter is entirely subjective, whether we fancy it or not.

Sure, it means embracing the foggy uncertainty. But here's the kicker: value knows no bounds. So, the price tag on what you offer could be anything.

You just need to find your true fans. When you do what you can't help but do, your admirers are definitely out there somewhere.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Attention to Attention / February 26, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

For several years now, I've almost completely cut out alcohol. No, I don't deem it evil, and I don't judge those who enjoy a drink. Occasionally, I savor a glass of wine – gatherings with friends, celebrations, and such.

But the regret kicks in almost immediately. As soon as ethanol starts infiltrating my brain. You see, my attention has become precious to me lately. It's become a new necessity and even an occasional pleasure.

Clarity of thought, sensitivity to nuances, and an all-encompassing perspective. It wasn't as crucial before. Have it? Great. Don't? No big deal.

I used to roll along life's tracks like a tram – night in the depot, a series of stops during the day. Child's play to control: two pedals – gas and brake.

One day, I got tired of being the tram conductor. I stepped off the rails.

Greater freedom comes with a price – responsibility for the consequences. If you want to fly, learn not to fall. And the closer you get to the clouds, the higher the demands for vigilance.

Yes, alcohol consoles, liberates, and amuses. But in return, it cunningly steals my consciousness. It's like the mosquito's saliva. It contains an analgesic that makes the skin puncture barely noticeable.

I'm no longer willing to lose consciousness for free. The exchange must be equivalent. Now I understand the Peruvian Indians. For them, plant extracts are tools for healing and self-discovery.

Changing consciousness with a "potion" just for fun or to numb the suffering mind? Too expensive and ineffective in the long run.

I'd rather keep my consciousness clear, especially when chaos reigns around. And when the time is right for next transformation, I have a choice of tools.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Founders vs. Managers / February 25, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, book cover fragment

What sets entrepreneurs apart from managers?

It's not knowledge. Whose CV is full of MBAs, CFAs, CIPMs, PhDs?

It's not experience either. Among successful founders, you find both seasoned veterans and young upstarts.

Personality type? No, there are nerds and bonaparts aplenty in both camps.

After two decades observing them closely, I've cracked the code.

They pray to different gods.

For a founder, it is Function. For a manager, it is Form.

Allow me to illustrate with an excerpt from Robert Pirsig's book:

When he brought his motorcycle over I got my wrenches out but then noticed that no amount of tightening would stop the slippage, because the ends of the collars were pinched shut.

"You’re going to have to shim those out," I said.

"What’s shim?"

"It’s a thin, flat strip of metal. You just slip it around the handlebar under the collar there and it will open up the collar to where you can tighten it again. You use shims like that to make adjustments in all kinds of machines."

"Oh," he said. He was getting interested. "Good. Where do you buy them?"

"I’ve got some right here," I said gleefully, holding up a can of beer in my hand.

He didn’t understand for a moment. Then he said, "What, the can?"

"Sure," I said, "best shim stock in the world."

I thought this was pretty clever myself. Save him a trip to God knows where to get shim stock. Save him time. Save him money.

But to my surprise he didn’t see the cleverness of this at all. In fact he got noticeably haughty about the whole thing. Pretty soon he was dodging and filling with all kinds of excuses and, before I realized what his real attitude was, we had decided not to fix the handlebars after all.

...I should say, to explain this, that beer-can aluminum is soft and sticky, as metals go. Perfect for the application. Aluminum doesn’t oxidize in wet weather...or, more precisely, it always has a thin layer of oxide that prevents any further oxidation. Also perfect.

For a while I thought what I should have done was sneak over to the workbench, cut a shim from the beer can, remove the printing and then come back and tell him we were in luck, it was the last one I had, specially imported from Germany. That would have done it. A special shim from the private stock of Baron Alfred Krupp, who had to sell it at a great sacrifice. Then he would have gone gaga over it.

...I was seeing what the shim meant. He was seeing what the shim was. That’s how I arrived at that distinction.".

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Eyes Wide Awake / February 24, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

Yesterday, me and the dog strolled across the green light at the pedestrian crossing. A lady in a Volvo nearly ran us over. How so? No driver behind the wheel—she was completely lost in her phone.

Luckily, I've got this old habit. I always look the approaching driver in the face. Even if I have to turn my head for a car coming from the side-rear.

It's crucial to figure out if the driver noticed me or not.

When I used to drive, certain pedestrians would astonish me. They'd cross the road, looking ahead proudly. Wanted to shout at them, "Are you made of rubber? Or do you have 9 lives in reserve like a cat?"

I owe this habit to riding a motorcycle. There you realize you have to watch not just yourself but literally everyone around. And several steps ahead.

The reason is the asymmetry of consequences. A collision can kill or disable a biker, but leaves the driver with only a scare and a damaged door.

But heightened attention is apt not only on the road. An elite athlete, a surgeon, or an entrepreneur would confirm this. Spiritual practices and religions also teach that without mindfulness, there's no life.

For instance, in Ancient Mesopotamia, the supreme god Marduk defeated Tiamat, a dragon-goddess of the primordial chaos-ocean. In addition to lips ablaze with fire, he possessed 4 enormous ears and 4 all-seeing eyes. Marduk was aware of it all.

"Don't fear anything. But stay vigilant," my therapist used to say.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Who Governs Your Ship? / February 23, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

"When the company fails, most people blame the CEO. I generally blame the board," said hedge fund investor Bill Ackman. He manages $18 billion, raking in an average of 31.2% annually.

His idea is simple—the owner bears the main responsibility. Period.

In a private company, it's the founders themselves. In a public corporation, the owners' interests are represented by the directors they hire.

Excuses like "We were misled," "The CEO ignored us," or "He turned out to be incompetent" diagnose the board, not the CEO.

Only the shipowner decides whether to hire a captain for risky trading venture or to take the helm himself.

To own something automatically means answering for it. It's like balancing the books in accounting: Assets = Liabilities.

The owner complaining about the CEO is as absurd as a rider blaming the horse, a beaver faulting the dam, or a chief accusing the tribe. "Eyes saw what they bought," says the Ukrainian proverb. Those are the rules of the grown-up game.

But what's said holds true in a broader sense. Each of us has the right, and thus the responsibility, for what we allow into our lives:

Ideas,
News,
Worries,
Temptations,
Impressions,
Agreements,
All sorts of people.

Who is to blame? The ruler of your kingdom. Is that you or not?

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Allow the Impossible / February 22, 2024 by Alexander Lyadov

A couple of days ago, in the grappling match, I messed up my toe. The joint swelled up. I can walk, but I'm limping badly. Today, I debated - hit the training or give it a pass?

On one hand, jiu-jitsu is pure chaos. So, the risk of making the injury worse is sky-high. On the flip side, if I wait for perfect health, the kinomo in the closet will gather dust.

I want to grapple, but I can't.

I cracked this dilemma about five years back, same injury. I told my opponents, "Let's start in a position that suits you. You've already got my back, choking the life out of me. And I'll be on the defense."

The scale of our showdown shrunk to a tiny area (my neck). Yet, the intensity stayed high, even went up. Main thing - my legs are safe, 'cause they're almost out of the game.

The insight applies beyond the mats. In business and life, we face dilemmas that seem to have no good solutions. Try describing the desired outcome paradoxically:

"I go all in grappling, zero risk of hurt."

Then, live with that thought. Yeah, it seems impossible. Yeah, there's no solution right now. Treat it like a mental experiment.

It's like a famous koan: "Show me the sound of one hand clapping." That's how a Zen Buddhist teacher helped a student reach enlightenment, going beyond the limits of logical thinking.

Find the solution, and you'll be like, 'Why didn't I see this before?!'.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

About me:
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.