When is it important to want little? /  by Alexander Lyadov

“My greatest skill has been to want little”. These are the words of the transcendentalist writer Henry David Thoreau, author of the terrific self-reflection book Walden, or Life in the Woods. We are so used to the maxim, “More is better,” that we implement it where appropriate and where not. But any idea is essentially a tool and requires knowing the limits of its application to avoid injury at work.

In business, the frugality of the founder’s desires can protect him from unnecessary anxiety and mistakes. For example, when searching for an investor, an entrepreneur may try to find an all-in-one solution–an uninterrupted provider of capital, a wise mentor and an energetic business development partner. If there is such an investor in any universe, the likelihood of meeting him in this one is negligible. It is more likely that the founder will bite on the promises of a wily investor who knows the secret entrepreneurial dreams. It is known that the search for a magician leads to a storyteller. The result of cooperation will be disappointment, claims and corporate conflict.

It is more reasonable to lower your expectations by accepting reality as it is: “The main thing is for the investor to pay every agreed tranche on time, and then not to interfere with me building this business. If it suddenly turns out that he can sometimes suggest something clever - hallelujah - that will be the cherry on the cake.” This mindset will help the founder speak bluntly to potential investors: “I expect only financial capital from you. And any specific expertise I will later buy where I choose myself.” This negotiating position is very strong. As entrepreneur and investor Naval Ravikant astutely observed, “Negotiations are won by whoever cares less..” May the force be with you!

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

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Risk and Reward /  by Alexander Lyadov

Peter Drucker, one of the most influential management theorists of the 20th century, put it succinctly: “All profit is derived from risk”. Of course, everyone is eager to get something of value for nothing, without worry or effort. But reality with a firm hand stops such infantilism. Risk, like an exam test, separates the majority of those who only want it from the few who are willing, ready, and able.

No one likes risk, per se. Even the serial entrepreneur goes for it with a fiddling heart. Of course, he will do everything he can to eliminate the “stupid risk” - the one that destroys rather than generates profit. But the bottom line is market risk, which cannot be avoided. So the founder voluntarily and deliberately takes a step into uncomfortable uncertainty. The investment of capital, time, and effort in a new business illustrates this most clearly. The most valuable resource has to be let loose at first, only to receive a generous reward from Mr. Market, sometimes 5 or 10 years later. Or get nothing, which happens depressingly often. Even in the United States, without epidemics, revolution, or war, 20% of new businesses fail in the first year, 50% within five years, and 65% within 10 years [1].

The insidiousness of risk is that in the real world, that is, outside social networks, university campuses, and progressive coffee shops, there are no guarantees, no justice, and no mercy. The entrepreneur is left to do the best he can and then accept what will be. His willingness to take significant risks is incomprehensible to almost no one. So the existential loneliness of the entrepreneur is inevitable. But when the gods accept the sacrifice of the daredevil and lavishly shower him with gifts, the envy of the philistine is ridiculous, though understandable. Deep down, everyone is aware of the sparks of curiosity and determination to look into the Unknown. Fortunately, there is no need to risk it all at once. Just as with weights, the risk can be dosed to get used to a gradually increasing load. In the end, you may be surprised at the amount of profit you can extract from the additional risk you have accepted.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
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"I have an extremely important business decision to make. Can you help me?
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Go for it! /  by Alexander Lyadov

“For all the most important things in life, the timing always sucks,” wrote Rolf Potts, author of the “traveler’s bible”, Vagabonding: An Uncommon Guide to the Art of Long-Term World Travel. Most of us have inspiring dreams, usually in the form of vague outlines in a dense fog. They regularly remind us of them, in our youth with fervor, and as the years pass with growing reproach. “Eh, if it weren’t for A, I’d be busy making dreams come true today,” we tell ourselves, lamenting the long To Do list of work, family and household issues. “I’ll just finish the B’s and then…” - we lie to ourselves, for we know that C, D, E, F, etc. will come next. If only we could stretch out our hand, pluck it and taste it with pleasure, but no, we have to climb so high and risk falling to the ground.

Sometimes Providence surprises us with a sudden reshuffle of all the cards, which nullifies our past achievements, as well as our problems. With new cards in our hands, we can be much closer to our dreams than ever before. It seems time to act, but no. Immediately, like worms out of a can, worries G, H, I, J, K crawl out. In addition to the longing for the dream, there is also the fear that it will come true. It is a kind of sweet game of the noble victim of insurmountable events. On the one hand, the narcissism: “How bold and ambitious my dreams are. What a potential, huh?”. And on the other, the infantilism that avoids responsibility for the fiasco: “God knows, I really wanted to. But the conditions weren’t perfect.”

If the hidden enjoyment of the game is interrupted, then all that remains is the imperfect conditions. I think it’s designed that way for a reason. After all, if someone kneaded, baked, chewed, moistened with enzymes, and poured our dream down our, um, gullet, what, exactly, is our role? That’s right, nothing. It turns out that the greater the gap between the desirable future and the miserable conditions now, the greater Providence’s confidence in our ability to transform one into the other. It whispers: “Go for it! You are capable of much more”.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an extremely important business decision to make. Can you help me?
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U-turn /  by Alexander Lyadov

John Wheeler, the physicist who coined the term "black hole"

 

Science communicator Brett Hall suggests: “Take a piece of paper, take a pen, draw two dots on the piece of paper. Now, how many unique straight lines can you draw through those two dots? It should be fairly obvious to you that only one line can be drawn. However, we know that’s false”. To prove this, all you have to do is fold the sheet in half and pierce both points through with a pen. Now you have not one line, but two. How? What?! Oh, right, of course…

The process of finding a way out of any impasse is similar. At first, we come to the conviction that there is no successful solution to our difficult problem at all. After all, we have made so much effort, tried all the known methods, invited experts, but to no avail. Only one variant is evident, but it is unacceptable because it requires too much sacrifice. For example, there is no ink in our pen, or under the law of wartime we cannot use it. We experience anger, despair, depression, fatigue, and so on.

But one day, thanks to unusual circumstances or an encounter with the right person, our worldview undergoes a U-turn. Within the usual two-dimensional space, our reflections are stuck like a deer in a swamp. But in multidimensional space, there is no trap or prey. The static becomes dynamic. The knot unties itself. Sometimes it is hard to believe that the problem that has oppressed us for so many years is not an omnipotent terminator, but a colossus on clay feet. Probably for the “Aha!” moments, I adore my job and life in general. Even if for a short time, there is peace in my soul and the certainty that anything is possible.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an extremely important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

The heat of life /  by Alexander Lyadov

Christine Francis mused aloud, “There!—you’re doing it again. Both times, when the coffee was poured, you’ve held your hands around the cup. As it gave you a kind of comfort.” Across the dinner table, Albert Wells gave his perky sparrow’s smile…: “Prospecting, in the north, you never waste anything if you want to stay alive, not even the heat from a cup you’re holding. It’s a habit you get into.” It’s a habit that becomes part of your flesh and blood.” An excerpt from the 1965 bestselling novel The Hotel by Arthur Haley reminds us of the value of what we have here and now.

Such frugality is understandable to someone whose work takes place on the edge of the abyss, whether he is a warrior, a polar explorer, a free solo climber, a heart surgeon, or an entrepreneur. Even with years of experience and super-professional skills, they are clearly aware of their vulnerability and limited strength. In the language of myths, they know that they are dealing with the Dragon of Chaos, whose nature and habits are unknown, except that for the slightest misstep he is sure to incinerate or eat them.

In an emergency situation, man is forced to show humility, openness, and gratitude in order to make the most of what little he has at hand. There is no time to dream of more or to resent inappropriate form. If something serves a vital function, that’s a good thing. In this sense, carelessly scattering resources is a grave sin. Who knows, maybe that one sip of water, that one match, or the heat from a cup will be the last grain of sand, which at the decisive moment will turn the scales of fate in your favor?

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an extremely important business decision to make. Can you help me?
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The secret to startup magic /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

“At Stripe, the main thing I took away is that when you combine high energy, sound judgment, low ego, and small teams, you just get magic,” says Shreyas Doshi, now an advisor to fast-growing startups, and former product leader and engineer at Stripe, Twitter, Google, Yahoo, etc.

These may not be sufficient conditions for the success of a new business project, but they are 100% necessary, otherwise, it just won’t take off. But why these exact requirements? My experience in co-founding and helping launch companies from various industries suggests that it’s all about speed of decision-making.

By definition, any initial stage takes place in an ocean of chaos, when the waves of uncertainty mercilessly beat the project, spinning, twisting and trying to drown it. As it happens in an extreme situation, during a surgery or a wrestling match, it is necessary to analyze, decide and act with lightning speed, because the reality severely punishes slow-witted, laggards and idlers.

High energy is needed to overcome the inertia of the surrounding business environment clinging to the status quo. Sound judgment gets rid of dangerous illusions, reducing iteration time. Low ego saves limited resources without squandering them on psychological defenses, intrigue, and power struggles. A compact team fuses individuals into a single “organism,” leveling their weaknesses and multiplying their strengths. As a result, what your competitors require weeks and months, and therefore many millions of dollars of investment, your project makes in a couple of days, creating an advantage out of nothing. And even if you tell them your secret, your competitors can do nothing quickly. Because changing your mindset is the hardest thing to do.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an extremely important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Personality and demands /  by Alexander Lyadov

Our dog behaves differently with me, wife, son and daughter. The creature is one, but there are four modifications. Why? Each of us unconsciously puts different demands on him. Over 25,000 years of cohabitation, the dog has learned to guess what the human wants from it. A dog cannot become, for example, a snake. The biological framework does not allow it. And man, thanks to his imagination, has more plasticity and adaptability and therefore can become almost anything. In many ways, it depends on the demands of the environment. Today it means society rather than wild nature. Man manifests himself by the facet expected by the specific culture in which he survives and grows.

In this sense, the influence on the personality of the family, first the mother and then the father, is fundamental. Initially, in the child’s perception, it is the mother who embodies the ambivalent Life, loving, comforting, frightening and punishing him. Even without realizing what they want from the children, the mother and father inevitably make demands, what they must be, or else… Having assimilated in childhood his (or her) relationship with the primary object, a person will carry it through all the life. He will struggle, pursue, avoid, and worry about something nebulous that irresistibly beckons to him and/or scares him to death. As psychotherapists say, he or she will relentlessly replay his or her symptom in different circumstances and with different people. At least until he realizes its power over him and “domesticates” it.

That is why, for example, in business one should be super-careful in choosing people, especially co-founders and top managers. For one thing, regardless of their stated intentions, they will act the way their symptom tells them to act. It is better to guess early on what truly drives them. On the other hand, by adapting, people will begin to hide or exhibit those traits that your company culture can’t stand or, on the contrary, passionately desires. This, by the way, is not a matter of abstract missions&values, but an honest description of your corner of reality as it is.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.

”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

"I have an extremely important business decision to make. Can you help me?
Reserve a time on my calendar that is convenient for you to meet with me. We'll clarify your request and discuss options for how you can help.

Acid test /  by Alexander Lyadov

Jonathan Shroyer co-founded Officium Labs with the goal of helping clients turn contact centers into profit centers. The business grew rapidly and he eventually sold it at a valuation multiple of 20xEBITDA. Jonathan said what annoyed him the most when buyers started making offers: “It’s when the CEO on the call tells you all the amazing stuff and is really exciting about you. And then when you send an email to the CEO, they never respond. If you are interested in my company, you should respond to my email. And in fact, that was the number one reason why I decided even not to even consider that offer. Because that disrespect was enough for me to say: “Hey, this is the wrong culture. I don’t want put people in the company like this.”

One of the characteristics of a true entrepreneur is attention to such seemingly small things. Most people will say, “No way, that’s nonsense. After all, the CEO was so enthusiastic.” That is, they focus on declarations, whereas Jonathan analyzed the CEO’s behavior. His intuition was looking for an anomaly, a glitch, a mismatch. Intuition knows that deeds outweigh words. By the time people have climbed to the corporate top, they are already adept at juggling words, that is, lying. Behavior is more difficult to distort, because long-running neural pathways force a person to act in this way, not otherwise.

When it comes to important events like selling a company, there is no such thing as a small thing. Especially if you, as the founder, are to receive a portion of the deal as an earnout within a few years. And if you care whether your team falls into good or bad hands. Any hostage rescue expert, investigative journalist or psychoanalyst will tell you that the devil is in the details. When the stakes are high and your opponent is skilled in the art of deception, remember the advice of the boy in the movie Amelie: “Monsieur, when the finger points to the sky, the fool looks at the finger.” Let us be vigilant and clever.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

One who creates value /  by Alexander Lyadov

“As always? Coffee with lactose-free milk and a glass of warm water,” the barista at the newly opened Shu coffee shop says with a smile. And this is only the third time I’ve been there. Kyiv has a chance to become a coffee Mecca for pilgrims from Europe. Even now, during the war, a new coffee shop opens regularly. And what kind of boom will happen when Ukraine wins? The choice is there, and it’s getting bigger. All other things being equal, in which coffee shop will I end up? Certainly, where I am welcomed. I wonder if there is only one such barista in Shu or the rest like him. Depends on whether the business has a Master and a System. Time will tell.

This is an example of how competitive advantage in the commodity category is literally born out of nothing. There are several others around this coffee shop that are similar to each other. However, in one of them, even for the hundredth time you will be served politely, qualitatively, but, alas, soullessly. And in the other, there is a feeling of discomfort, like a tourist who interrupted a ritual at church. Right now I’m spontaneously advertising a certain cafe for free. Why? Because in the service business, the human factor decides everything.

It is not easy, but it is possible to set up processes in such a way that ingredients are of high quality, prices are reasonable, and the final product is delicious. It is more difficult to achieve that the customer experience is reproduced steadily, without “pits”. People, on the other hand, are both the greatest challenge and the greatest potential. This is true for a premium consulting company such as McKinsey, and for a tiny coffee shop, dreaming of growing into a successful chain. Well, how to motivate a Harvard graduate with a six-figure annual salary is clear, but try to keep trendy and communicative young people in SME business, much less “inspire” them to remember what guests like. That’s where the real art is! First of all, it is a matter of selecting those who cannot help but love people and give them joy.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

How to learn faster? /  by Alexander Lyadov

In his video course, the trainer of champions John Danaher emphasizes again and again that for all five variations of the “guillotine” technique it is necessary to ensure the “High Wrist” position. This is the only way to block the two carotid arteries in the opponent’s neck at once, radically limiting the flow of oxygen to the brain. Everything else — the position of your body or the grip with the other hand — is of secondary importance. If you managed to close High Wrist on your opponent’s neck, you’re already halfway to victory.

The most important thing in learning anything is to understand the most important thing. Otherwise, it is easy to drown in the ocean of interesting, diverse and promising information. It would seem such a simple thought. But looking at the training content from experts in business, science, crafts or sports, you come to the conclusion that in 90% of cases, students can not digest it. The amount of information provided is generous, the details are described thoroughly, the quality of presentation is excellent, but it is impossible to fit this knowledge into their heads. For example, the rings from the children’s game “Pyramid” delight the eye with their colors and sizes, but are absolutely useless if there is no pole to string them on.

A professional can tell the nuances of his field of knowledge a thousand and one nights, like Scheherazade. A student needs, as my coach Vadim Puzanov used to say, a “basic foundation”, that is, a solid foundation on which to build a skyscraper. Although there are enough experts in each subject area, but those who can quickly and effectively transfer knowledge to students is hard to find. First of all, because the expert must have a clear hierarchy of knowledge in his head, which he can individually convey to the student: “This is the most important thing for you right now. You can forget about the rest for now.” If you are discovering some new area in business and beyond, the first thing to do is to find an expert who knows how to separate the grains from the chaff. Perhaps one piece of advice will radically accelerate your growth.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Russian ghoul /  by Alexander Lyadov

I remember a movie about a boy who found out he had a gift. Although at first he thought it was a curse. Sitting on the bus or in a store, he could clearly see the underside of ordinary passers-by — a witch, a vampire, and other evildoers. Besides being frightened, the boy thought he was going crazy, because no one else noticed the creatures swarming everywhere. Then he learned to control himself and even make the most of his gift.

Real life is worse than any movie. The scale of the atrocities of a “typical” folkloric werewolf is dozens, maybe hundreds of innocent souls, for he attacks selectively, individually, and at special times. And the bloodthirstiness of the Russian ghoul has no bottom at all. Those who have a conscience have a limit. For the Ghoul, “it sank” in 2000, which he admitted with a smirk. The villains of fairy tales are no match for the Russian ghoul. He seems to dream of surpassing Stalin and Mao by keeping an imperial count of tens and hundreds of thousands of lives, even millions, if he is allowed to. His omnivorousness is remarkable — if no one else is available, he devours his own people, for that is his ghoul nature.

That is not to say that no one can see the essence behind his lean shell, his brash rhetoric, and his insinuating manner. But many intelligent people, including leaders of Western powers, either naively failed to notice the alarming signals, or fell in love with the PR image of the male hamadryl, or in horror tried to satisfy his boundless hunger with small offerings.

In 1856 Abraham Lincoln said: “You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.” Truth is not a submarine; eventually, it comes to the surface. This year the world saw the Russian ghoul for what he is — with his ice-cold eyes, skewed jaws, and skull bursting with hatred for life in general. Whether the world community has had enough of the revelation to sober up is the question. Today one hears calls to “save face” (to whom?!) to the beast. One has to believe, if not in people’s sanity, then at least in their instinct for self-preservation.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

A vacation from yourself /  by Alexander Lyadov

Sometimes, during business therapy sessions with overseas clients, they suddenly listen in and ask anxiously, "What's that sound? Is that an air-raid siren?" I nod my head affirmatively and hurry back to their business. Why? A job I love is the best way to forget about whatever is complicating or poisoning my life.

Eugene Gendlin, founder of the Focusing method of psychotherapy, used to say, "The therapy is a vacation from myself. Truly, time with a client is a unique opportunity not to think about one's anxieties and hardships. If it had only been my wish, it would have been difficult to fulfill, as it is when you can't sleep despite trying. Fortunately, one hundred percent focus on the client's needs is a basic requirement for successful therapy. Whether I want to or not, I have to. So, when I give myself wholly to working on a client's request, I harmonize my own life at the same time.

The ideal is to reach a paradoxical state. On the one hand, the therapist must disappear so as not to interfere with the process inside the client with his "impurities" (emotions, biases). On the other hand, as the Other, the therapist must be clearly present in order to speed up the transformational process. To be and not to be at the same time, to help without helping, so that the solution to the problem will be born by itself.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Spectral problem-solving /  by Alexander Lyadov

“The easiest way to solve a problem is to deny it exists” — said Isaac Asimov, biochemist, writer and science popularizer. And the bigger the problem, the more desperately we want to forget about it. This is where the magical thinking of a child comes in, hiding with his head under a blanket, supposedly making monsters roam around the bed in vain all night long.

As a rule, it is uncertainty that infinitely inflates the problem. The imagination readily paints the most negative and hopeless scenario, discouraging the will to fight. A person’s life turns into a gloomy fairy tale, where it is urgently necessary to get the magic cure, but there is absolutely no idea where and how.

The paradox is that sometimes the solution is right at hand. And the more impregnable the problem, the more vulnerable it is, as Odysseus proved to the one-eyed Cyclops. You just need to find the right point of force. By the way, it doesn’t take much at all.

Curiously, there is a spectrum in front of us. On the left edge, the problem is “solved” by denying it altogether. And from the opposite right edge, the problem is eliminated by itself, if the necessary and sufficient conditions are created. Notably, the options in the middle of the spectrum require a significant investment of energy, time, and money. In contrast, in terms of resources, the solutions at the edges of the spectrum tend toward zero. But since negation is a pseudo-solution, it only makes sense to aim at one extreme. The process of finding a solution is simplified when there is an ideal.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Self-discovery /  by Alexander Lyadov

Whether it's a conflict in business or an argument in a social media, it's easy to let your impulsive emotions run wild. They are as uncontrollable as the gag reflex. An attack of “righteous” anger, irritation and hatred overwhelms the brain, chattering it in the skull like balls in a lottery machine. At that moment, some mighty force takes possession of man, subjugating his will to itself. Enslavement to passions, demonic possession or acting out — whatever you call the phenomenon, the result is dire for all involved.

I remember once on the road, some car and I started cutting each other off in retaliation. The fantasy quickly inflamed the misunderstanding into a Sicilian vendetta. Enraged, we parked and strode out of the cars for the “duel.” But having met not a demonic image, but a living person, we sobered up from the absurdity of the situation and, in embarrassment, dispersed.

There are different ways to confront these forces: ascesis, prayer, meditation, sports, psychotherapy, etc. It seems to me, technically, common is to create distance — yes, IT is there, but so are YOU. By making passion the object of exploration, we reclaim the lost power back.

But why did we succumb to the impulse in the first place? A wise man gave the thought, “The only roughness to cling to is the Ego. Excessive preoccupation with one’s own needs and inflated self-esteem is a sore point that, no matter how careful you are, you can’t help stepping on. Everyone has it at a very specific point. It is clearly indicated by your explosive overreaction to a relatively small stimulus. And the analyst’s eye will even notice the deeply hidden pleasure in allowing yourself to get off to the fullest. In the heat of the moment, you can’t realize such subtleties. You need a “laboratory,” where a specialist or group in a trusting environment can help you experience, understand, and internalize the lesson you have learned.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Dog Life /  by Alexander Lyadov

My dog has a new ritual. More accurately, an addition to an old ritual. Before I pour the food into the bowl, it has always been important for him to lick the feeding hand three times. What’s new is that while he’s waiting for the command “Eat!”, all of a sudden he started giving me a paw on his own. At first I thought: “How cute is that!” but then I wondered about the meaning. Today I decided to see what he would do if I practiced his stamina by dragging out the long-awaited finale. The dog was surprised at first, then raised his paw. Seeing no success, he did it again and again. Now his action no longer seemed cute, rather it was an impatiently demanding gesture: “Master, jokes aside, let me eat!” It became clear that the clever dog invented all this with one purpose — to influence his master to get dopamine ASAP. After all, the city dog’s most important values in life are food, walking and play.

Of course, the 26,000 human-dog cohabitation is no trifle. Involuntarily everyone will study the psychology of the other side. But I was struck by the “discovery” that even an animal tries to take control of a vital process. The dog doesn’t go into a stupor or look for excuses for his passivity, but takes the initiative in his paws and puts the experiment on me. If my response accelerates the achievement of his metrics, the innovation is fixed as an updated status quo. Despite his complete dependence on his master and the difference in intelligence (debatable), the dog relentlessly tries to hack me to improve his life. This attitude is reminiscent of the characteristic of real entrepreneurs from investor Paul Graham — relentless resourcefulness. In that sense, my dog is an entrepreneur from nose to tail.

Frankly, I’d like to act the same way whenever circumstances, the system, or someone proves to be stronger than me by an order of magnitude. Without unnecessary pauses, immediately proactively look for a hack, a loophole, a way out. To create a new degree of freedom where there doesn’t seem to be one.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Life without fire /  by Alexander Lyadov

I was once struck by the short story “To Build a Fire” by Jack London. The main character is traveling with his dog through northwestern Canada on a very cold day (-59 °C). One day the traveler falls knee-deep in water. He recalls an old man who warned him that no man should travel alone in the Klondike if the temperature is below -46 °C. Further events illustrate why. I won’t spoil it — the story is too good.

Only a city dweller spoiled by the benefits of civilization could come up with the absurd idea that nature is a kind and affectionate mother. Sitting at a laptop in a cafe or strolling along the paths of a park, it is easy to fall into the illusion that the world around us unconditionally loves us and longs to make us happy. Nothing could be further from the truth. Nature doesn’t care about us. It will bite, trample, and swallow anyone who lets their guard down and is naive about it. Our ancestors understood this and therefore made heroic efforts to fence off its ferocity with a high and reliable “fence”. Our usual parks, gardens and even forests are spaces of pacified chaos, where everything dangerous is etched, domesticated or banished away. Whole generations of people grow up in the “gardens of paradise” of civilization, taking the safety and benevolence of their environment as a given.

So when such a person sees nature as it is — bloodthirsty, unforgiving and unjust — he instantly has an epiphany. The task of “surviving at any cost” becomes central. Only in the safe comfort of the “cave” can one ponder whether nature is mother or stepmother. An encounter with reality can occur at any moment, whether it is an abnormal snow storm in New York, a carelessness in the mountains or the forced landing of a tourist plane in the taiga.

However, the greatest revelation awaits someone who has been convinced of the good nature of all people, especially himself. There is a dark underbelly in every human being that neither he nor those around him are aware of. The encounter of careless naivete with this “beast” leads at best to PTSD. So what to do? Open your eyes wide and voluntarily take the feasible steps to discover the true nature of the world, people, and yourself.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

What’s in the bush? /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

When a leopard sneaks up on an antelope, it tries to blend into the landscape. Although the prey regularly scans its surroundings, hunger causes it to lower its head into the grass. This gives the predator the opportunity to move even closer. And then a little more. All the way to a devastating attack.

The ability to recognize danger where there seems to be none determines the survivability of a particular animal on the savanna. When the threat is obvious, it’s usually too late. Therefore, the peripheral eye of the antelope does not look for the leopard itself, but for a vague hint of all predators in general. The brain is able to catch an “unnatural” fluctuation of a fragment of the environment to raise its vigilance and freeze. If there are no more strange deviations, the antelope will decide, “False alarm.” Probably a mistake. The predator may have more patience to remain motionless. The animal that is more sensitive in recognizing patterns of abnormal signals here and there will pass on its genes to its offspring.

n this sense, it is easier for animals than for humans, because they fully “trust” the instinct that there is Something in the bushes. We humans put a lot of effort into stabilizing our world and making it as safe as possible. As a result, our vigilance is atrophied and our complacent minds devalue the “primitive” instinct. Until force majeure strikes. One day a cataclysm happens, knocking the ground out from under our feet. Then everyone, against his or her will, enters the first grade. In this school of life, the worldview is rebooted and trust in oneself quickly returns. More precisely, to that unknown part of yourself that sleeps half-awake and whose primary function is to protect you. Over millions of years, this tool has evolved into perfection. Why give up an important part of yourself? Instead of “either-or,” wouldn’t it be better to choose “and-and”?

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Are there resources or not? /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

“A resource is material which is useful given some knowledge,” said “science communicator” Brett Hall, reflecting on the books of physicist David Deutsch. Take aluminum, for example. It’s a wonderful structural material. But our forefathers couldn’t use it, even though it was always under their feet. In terms of occurrence in the Earth’s crust, it ranks first among metals and third among the elements (Wikipedia). However, there is no reliable information about the production of aluminum until the 19th century. In nature, aluminum, due to its high chemical activity, occurs almost exclusively in the form of compounds. It was mankind’s accumulated knowledge that allowed Danish physicist Hans Ersted to transform worthless matter into a valuable resource in 1825.

But this insight is also applicable on a broader scale, whether micro or macro. For example, to the novice wrestler, every bout looks like a daunting clump of chaotic movements, while the experienced athlete sees an endless stream of opportunities to apply technique #1, 2 or 100. Similarly, the storm of force majeure events throws the top manager into shock and anabiosis. While the entrepreneur immediately shakes off the stress, like a dog after a fight, and begins to figure out how to turn fallen trees and debris into building blocks. Figuratively speaking, the ability to see light where others see only darkness distinguishes a professional in any field — military, engineer, entrepreneur or athlete.

By the way, this is why we should not succumb to the apocalyptic sentiments of those who yell, “Oh, that’s it! Resources are about to run out. Our planet is doomed.” This is the narrow view of people who do not understand the power of creativity and invention. There are innumerable and inexhaustible resources hidden all around us on Earth and in space. Exponential increases in knowledge will gradually open up access to them. We need to trust a little more in the potential that is hidden within us.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Still no transformation? /  by Alexander Lyadov

Today I did not find the coffee can in its usual place — on the kitchen table. Then I was surprised to find it on the shelf above my head — where we used to keep coffee until six months ago when I said: "Since I make coffee twice a day, let the can be on the table at hand." It would seem that 6 months is enough time to form a new habit, but no, the mind didn't even notice how the old habit took over. This is a trivial example, but I observe a similar phenomenon in business too.

Let’s say the founder has a clear vision of a radical transformation that will take the company from point A to the desired point B. Such a vision is an achievement in itself, since most players in any industry don’t have one. Unfortunately, it is not enough. For company behavior, which means employees, to change significantly, they need to voluntarily “buy” this vision. Which is possible if the vector of their personal development and the vector of the company’s growth coincide, as fellow travelers on some part of the road.

But the very fact that the company needs a reboot confirms that the old “modus operandi” has brought it to a dead end. That is to say, for years a team was formed of those who wanted to or were not against moving toward A. Even if someone secretly dreamed of B, there were only a few of them, and secondly, they had to adapt to the dominant paradigm of A or leave. It is obvious why transformation attempts so often fail - the majority outright rejects them, while the minority yearns for them with all their soul, but the learned inertia of behavior is already too strong. By the way, the founder is also human, and sometimes his actions (A) contradict his intentions (B), as the coffee situation illustrates above.

The only way to reverse institutional inertia is to create “islands of revolution” that will seduce, infect or inspire new behavior in everyone else. How? If you’re interested, I’ll tell you sometime.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Catalyst /  by Alexander Lyadov

If I were to show you the stacks of drafts and calculate the time I spent trying to solve my dilemmas, you would be horrified, “No way!” At home at my desk, rushing to a meeting, or on vacation while driving, I was trying to get out of yet another web I was stuck in. The process was like the unraveling of koans that a Zen master gives to a disciple. Unlike the monk, I did not attain the Great Satori, but there were tangible, though unexpected, benefits to be gained from years of self-torture.

Firstly, the range of tools I now have significantly expanded, although I did not set such a goal. Second, it has become clear where, when and what tools should and should not be used. Third, it became clear that, paradoxically, Problem = Solution. One easily transmutes into the other, if the necessary and sufficient prerequisites are created or are ripe for that. When in a deadlock, the first impulse is to look outside for the most promising resources in terms of efficiency and guarantees, while it is often enough to change the point of application of forces which are already available.

In fact, the latter is the greatest challenge. After the fact, a person is amazed: “Why did I ignore so obvious things for so long?”. The fact is that changing the angle of view is not so much a question of choosing a tool as it is of parting with hidden beliefs that are extremely dear to us for some reason. And how do we find what our eyes are adamantly unwilling to see? In chemistry, a catalyst is used to speed up a reaction. In business, a specialist (advisor, coach, psychotherapist) or fate (chance, providence, fate) comes in handy to accelerate the transformation of beliefs.

Yours sincerely,

-Alexander

You can help Ukraine defend itself and the World from Russian aggression here.


As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.