You're watching a colleague, a relative, or a friend.
He keeps stumbling over the same thing and complaining about it out loud.
He goes in circles. Misses opportunities. Fails to see the risk.
Your first impulse is to share your perspective.
Stop. Last time you did, he pushed back hard.
He brushed it off. Took offense. Dismissed it.
Does he actually enjoy stumbling? Why does he do this?
For now, he is not ready to receive anything from you, or from anyone else.
So what can you do?
You can pray for him. But you cannot force yourself on him.
Assuming, of course, that he is an adult, not a child.
Out of respect for his freedom to choose, you stay nearby and wait in silence.
While he keeps bumping his head and cursing his unfair fate.
And if you truly care about him, it will not be easy.
Accepting your own powerlessness to change anything.
Trusting his ability to change on his own.
Maybe one day he'll say: "You know, I should have listened to you back then."
You'll answer: "No. It was right. It's your life, not mine."
And both of you will realize that you had been there all along. Just as now.
Now for a plot twist.
He is me. Or you. Or all of us.
The one who isn't yet ready to take in another's perspective.
The one who protects his Ego, unable to tolerate the "wrong kind" of novelty.
The one who keeps stepping on the same rake and missing unique opportunities.
Meanwhile, the one who loves me quietly waits until I am ready.
Sincerely yours,
-Alexander
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.
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