Theo. R. Davis
"Beggars should be no choosers." This powerful proverb was published in English writer John Heywood's collection in 1562. One can think of it in a positive light, feeling gratitude for any gift of fate, especially when you are stuck.
Of course, no one is immune to tragic blows of fate. Yesterday, someone was featured on the cover of Forbes, and today he or she is forced to hide in Asia from creditors. However, no one willingly and in his or her right mind wants to be in the position of a beggar. Nonetheless, in negotiations, we often corner ourselves, depriving ourselves of any freedom to choose.
The proverb suggests how it all happens. The stronger our obsession with a specific result in negotiations, the stronger our claws get stuck in the trap. Desperately wanting what we don't have but our opponent does, we turn into beggars who can be pushed around. In addition, the extreme degree of desperation awakens base instincts in a person cornered, which he will come to regret.
The opposite is also true — any reduction in our fixation on a specific form automatically enriches us. That is why true entrepreneurs are willing to do anything to increase the number of their degrees of freedom. They intuitively and consciously use different techniques to avoid falling into the trap of their obsession.
The simplest and most effective way is to find the next best alternative to what is so desired at the negotiating table. The better your alternative is worked out, the more unshakable you become. Note that you don't need to be naturally bold and cool-headed. You also don't need to squeeze or bluff anyone. It's enough to be ready to stand up and leave at any moment. Your world is richer than this deal.
As we can see, the choice of whether we are a beggar or a chooser largely depends on our knowledge of our nature and our ability to control ourselves.
Sincerely yours,
-Alexander
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