Your Current Constraint /  by Alexander Lyadov

 

In Eli Goldratt's Theory of Constraints, it's crucial to find the "bottleneck."

It's the obstacle inside your business that most restricts the free flow of money through the system.

The core premise: a complex system has many interconnected elements, but to influence it — positively or negatively — it's enough to press on one point. Rarely two.

Henry Ford's assembly line is a classic example: no improvements or investments in the chain after a slow machine can increase the number of finished cars coming out. One holds everyone back.

Why not draw a parallel between TOC and personal development?

At any given moment in life, you find yourself running up against something:

  • "I'm stuck, and there's no way out."

  • "So much titanic effort, yet no results."

  • "It's like I've hit some kind of glass ceiling."

  • "I don't know what it is, but something keeps getting in my way."

  • "Just when I get everything back on track, I stumble again. Why?"

Know this: that's your current bottleneck. Your constraint. The biblical stumbling block. The skandalon. The temptation.

It's easy to recognize by its ability to hold your attention captive. It triggers every feeling except indifference — at minimum, embarrassment and curiosity, and often irritation, anxiety, dread, and rage.

You can't simply brush off the bottleneck. It's like a pebble in your shoe, the smell of smoke in your house, or an air-raid siren. Life goes on, of course, but you could hardly call it harmonious.

We'll return to this subject more than once. It's bottomless.

For now, I want to encourage you. Precisely in what currently limits you most, poisons your life, and causes you suffering lies what will open a new chapter in your life.

The Mind doesn't understand this. It's counterintuitive. Another paradox.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Beyond Control /  by Alexander Lyadov

The recent night brought a rich catch: twelve dreams.It was hard to write them all down fast enough before fully waking.

Such abundance doesn't matter in itself. This isn't a sport. But the number firmly underscores that I have no power over my dreams.

On one hand, it was I who saw them, recorded them, and interpreted them. On the other hand, I am merely the registering pen of a polygraph. The signal comes from "out there," passes through me, and creates a pattern.

I can't simply decide to have a particular dream and get one. No matter how hard I exercise my will, what pills I take, or what I read before bed. Even if a dream plays with the events of the day, I can't predict how.

Maybe that's why some people dismiss dreams as nonsense? It's hard to admit that valuable meaning can enter your life whether you want it to or not. The Ego feels vulnerable without control.

Something similar happens with those who see the body as a "machine." A not particularly reliable vehicle for their superior intellect. The idea that the body could be a source of deep insight strikes them as absurd.

Who weakened — or even severed — this connection inside a person? Who created the conflict between mind and body, rational and intuitive, will and desire, Ego and Self, primate and Nature, human and God?

Whoever did it knows his deceptive craft. Inner conflict is, unfortunately, the norm. And how many problems between people grow from this root?

Still, there's no reason for despair. The conflict was artificially created. Each of us can begin building a bridge within.

And all it takes is something very small: warm curiosity toward the Other.

You can start with dreams — strange, yes, but valuable precisely because of it.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Where Nothing Exists /  by Alexander Lyadov

Pluto was the god of the underworld and death.

He was depicted holding a bident, and sometimes a cornucopia.

Hmm. What does a symbol of wealth and fertility have to do with the realm of the dead?

Treasure never stops accumulating beneath the earth. Everything is there.

In ancient times, people noticed the paradox of renewal:

A seed must die for a stalk of grain to grow.

On one hand, the earth absorbs and digests everything in the world, turning it into potential form — primary matter.

On the other hand, it tirelessly gives rise to new life. This treasury can never be exhausted. In giving, it simultaneously receives.

It seems, then, that fertility and death are two sides of the same phenomenon.

The conclusion writes itself:

Abundance hides precisely where nothing exists, and nothing can exist.

Or: don't look for wealth among already existing, explicit forms.

Wait. Then how do you find your way? We're talking about the unknown.

A vague curiosity will guide you. A sense of concern. A pull. An interest.

What I've said above may help you stop looking for justification and guarantees.

Start paying more attention to what-is-transforming-within-you.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Protect the Source /  by Alexander Lyadov

Do you like seashells? Who doesn't? Beautiful and sturdy. Turn them into buttons if you want. Or place one on your dresser.

A shell is the external skeleton of a mollusk, providing both support and protection. After all, a mollusk is an invertebrate.

Figuratively speaking, what you're holding is the mollusk's "skeleton."

The very first whorl of the shell, its apex, forms before the mollusk even hatches from its egg. That's why it's called the embryonic whorl. The last whorl ends at the shell's opening.

A mollusk's shell looks like a cornucopia. A Horn of Plenty.

As long as the mollusk is alive, that "horn" both shelters life and brings forth more of it. The shell is naturally woven into the life of the mollusk, its population, and its environment.

But once the "horn" ends up in your hands, it has already ceased to be abundant. Whatever use it may bring, it will never give rise to new life again.

Outwardly, nothing has changed. The shell is still beautiful, strong, and spacious. It may even seem as though the mollusk is simply sleeping deep inside. You can still hear the ocean in it. Sadly, that's an illusion.

The life of a person, a group, and a society also spirals outward, adding one pearly layer after another. The shell itself is precious; much that is wonderful flows into the world from it.

What matters is not missing the moment when abundance begins to leave the "horn".

This happens too often — because form is tangible, while vitality is implicit and elusively ephemeral.

Don't fix your gaze on the products of life.

Look instead toward their Source.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Reveal, Don't Create /  by Alexander Lyadov

Unknown photographer

 

The word "create" naturally comes up when people talk about creativity.

It's a familiar word. But dig a little deeper, and it becomes misleading.

Creativity doesn't so much create as reveal.

The process moves from the inside out, not from the outside in.

From inside what?

From the system of "Body-Situation," where you're irresistibly drawn to help the force that longs to realize itself.

Remember playing on the beach as a child. Whenever a new wave rolled in, your hands frantically dug a channel through the sand so the water could flow freely and reach as far inland as possible.

What could you possibly do, after all, as a naïve and clumsy child? And how mighty was the ocean with its 1,400,000,000,000,000,000 tons of water?

And yet — thanks to your small but relentless hands — the ocean could push a meter deeper into the sand, forming a channel and delighting the children around you.

The adult cynic will smirk: "What's the point of these games? The channel was gone in an hour." The child might innocently ask him: "And what's the point of your schemes, deals, and manipulations? Besides you — who else is happy?"

As a child, you didn't create the channel. You allowed the implicit to reveal itself. Your Body responded to each particular wave with a unique design. Amorphous nothing took on the most fitting form.

Most importantly, the Ocean revealed something within the little creator. Something new.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Wild Element X /  by Alexander Lyadov

The advertising agency grew structurally out of the creative process.

It's simple: when there are new ideas, there are clients. Without ideas, there is nothing.

The structure consists of two key functions. Everything else is nice to have.

You guessed the first function immediately: Generation. Fresh ideas cannot be bought wholesale from China. They have to be drawn from the void.

The second role is Fixation. Something valuable but still fragile must not be lost. It needs to be recognized, protected, watered, nurtured.

Ideas bring in money — and with it, pleasant problems: payroll, paperwork, and so on. A set of useful subfunctions emerges.

Those subfunctions tend to consider themselves just as valuable as Generation, if not more so. After all, their world is clear and orderly. Generation is a dark forest.

If the people inside forget the "ontogeny" of creativity, the business is doomed.

No procedures, investments, reorganizations, training programs, or team replacements will revive what is dead. These are whale bones on the ocean floor.

By contrast, a company can visibly flourish after even the smallest changes, provided they occur at the right point. More precisely, FROM the right point, when the entire team recognizes What Does Not Yet Exist as its highest value.

Generating something new is not a trivial move like E2-E4. Creativity contains a wild element X that the mind cannot control.

The mind must bow before this mystery — if it wants to survive.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

The Body Is the CEO /  by Alexander Lyadov

Almost all the time, I wear a pair of glasses I bought by accident.

I needed them as a rare backup to another pair — one with a beautiful, bright, expensive frame. For the sake of that "main" pair, I tried on a pile of alternatives. The backup I grabbed off the shelf without much of a look.

The beautiful glasses sit unused — uncomfortable. The "backup" pair fit immediately, taking root as if they'd found their native soil.

I think of several other things I bought spontaneously — despite the rush, the delivery hassles, or the high price. They still bring me joy: a figurine, a leather jacket, a desk lamp.

"Joy" is the key word.

It gets lost too easily behind a pile of others — practical, appropriate, prestigious, high-quality, stylish, and so on.

The joy of using something is specific. It's a sensation in the whole body, not just the head. And not in how others perceive it — but in yourself.

I think back to choosing my motorcycle. After flipping through stacks of catalogs, I had a "sensible" favorite for a novice. I touched it in person — zero emotion. In a rush, I stopped into a Honda dealer, sat on an MT-07, and bought it on the spot.

I never once regretted it — the pleasure it brought me was immense. Experienced bikers put it this way: "You choose a motorcycle with your ass."

This is about the dominance of Body wisdom over the rationality of the Mind. The Mind performs its functions — monitoring defects, counting money, reviewing the contract. The Mind is the CFO. The Body is the CEO.

Of course, "Body" here doesn't mean a collection of muscles, bones, organs, and blood vessels. It means your entire organism, including the aspects you can see and the ones you can't.

The wisdom of the Body is the result of billions of years of evolution, down to the cellular level. It also carries the history of your entire lineage. And above all, the Body is inseparably connected to its environment.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Dragonness /  by Alexander Lyadov

Why does the Dragon guard the treasure in myths and fairy tales?

He waits for the Seeker not before the threshold, nor after it, but right on it.

Until then, the monsters are usually smaller.

Their function is to test readiness. Treasure seekers stumble over them and lose their way. Most of them, except one.

The encounter with the Dragon is the final chord of initiation.

You can't go around him, trick him, or send someone else in your place.

Worse still, despite all our fantasies, you can't even kill the Dragon.

Why?

The Dragon is you. Me. Every one of us. Humanity itself.

More precisely, he is the part of you that you consider alien and hostile.

You are the tail, frozen in terror before your own fanged jaws.

That is why, in some legends, the victorious knight soon becomes a monster himself. The Dragon is defeated. Dragonness, unfortunately, is not.

Destruction is a refusal to understand the meaning of his "terrible" function. How was he born? Under what conditions did he grow up? Who raised him?

Most importantly, how can Dragonness be turned into something that benefits everyone?

The hero has no interest in these questions. He falls for a simple and beautiful idea: "I am good. He is evil." In his mind, he is already embracing the princess while standing knee-deep in gold and precious jewels.

In other words, the hero dreams of possessing the very way of being that belongs to the Dragon. After all, who owns those dust-covered mountains of treasure now? Who abducted the innocent beauty and keeps her imprisoned beneath the earth?

The hero's naivete and immaturity lie in the fact that he cannot see his own greed, hatred, lust, hunger for power, and thirst for glory.

He projects all those negative qualities onto the world outside himself. The Dragon embodies everything, and only what, the hero has failed to accept within himself.

The Dragon is the last obstacle between the hero and his happiness. But once the hero owns the treasure, he begins to fear losing it all. Paranoia makes him see a murderous enemy in every new traveler who passes by.

Their battle is undeniably dramatic and captivating. Yet after watching it repeated in every possible variation, it becomes unbearably boring to wonder who will win: the Dragon or his tail.

The Dragon is not protecting the treasure from man.

Quite the opposite. The Dragon is protecting man from the treasure.

This gold cannot be possessed. If it is, death multiplies.

It's time for the hero to grow up. To stop spinning in circles and biting himself.

He must discover that there is a higher purpose. Serving it will require every last resource, including a Dragonness that has been understood and transformed.

Then the curse will lift — and life in that kingdom will bloom.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Never Alone /  by Alexander Lyadov

There is a paradox when it comes to our future.

On one hand, we want favorable change. What we have today is, in some ways, openly unsatisfying.

On the other hand, we're often unprepared for the form in which the future comes knocking, so we don't open the door.

Imagine there were no surprises, and the future unfolded exactly as you had pictured it. Before long, you'd be howling with boredom and doing something outrageous just to bring a fresh current into your life.

Deep down, you hunger to feel surprise, wonder, and awe.

Of course, only if that Novelty doesn't kill you.

Let's run a thought experiment:

Suppose whatever is coming doesn't frighten you at all.

Not terror. Not even the slightest hesitation.

How many surprises from Life would you be willing to accept then?

Exactly as many as it could give you, and you could hold.

And in that case, the more unexpected, the better.

Because the unknown feeds your growth, prosperity, and development.

So the real stumbling block is the feeling of being unsafe.

It all comes down to not trusting yourself: "I won't be able to handle whatever may come."

And that's true. The world, society, and the universe are stronger than any individual.

But who keeps telling everyone: "You are completely alone in this world and no one needs you"? For some reason, it's an especially popular belief today.

As long as you believe it, that's exactly what we experience: loneliness, despair, and isolation.

But scroll through your life and mark the moments when circumstances improved "by chance," when a stranger showed you kindness "for no reason," when a brilliant idea "suddenly" arrived.

Like a rope connecting a sailor's body to the ship in a storm, something holds you.

Psychology, philosophy, and religion each have many names for this connection.

What matters isn't what it's called — but the fact that .

The more often we remember this, the more open we become to what lies ahead.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Stockpile Nothing /  by Alexander Lyadov

Create Something from Nothing.

The phrase describes the creative act — and after it, much becomes clear.

But what happens in that very moment?

Yesterday I looked at this metaphor through the lens of construction and realized:

Before you can build anything, you need raw material.

In this case, the raw material is Nothing.

Emptiness. Zero. Void.

Somehow, you have to build up a supply of Nothing.

And not just enough, but a surplus.

Because it would be foolish to begin something this important only to discover a deficit of... Nothing.

That sounds wild — but stay with it.

Where and how do you obtain this mythical raw material?

There is only one way: become a Unbuilder for a while.

That means not preserving and building, but clearing out, dismantling, letting go.

The gods Shiva, Kali, Surt, and Rudra performed the function of destruction.

It follows that Nothing is the result of turning Something into ash.

Something that has already grown obsolete, outlived its purpose, decayed, and lost its meaning and form.

Practical actions:

  • ​take a pause.

  • forgive an offense.

  • confess a sin.

  • shred stacks of papers.

  • give away old clothes.

  • leave a dead-end job.

  • say goodbye to illusions.

  • give away what's been sitting unused.

  • stop fixing what should be thrown out.

  • replace "might come in handy" with "trash."

  • stop watering what won't grow on its own.

Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

The Heaviest Work /  by Alexander Lyadov

“Stop doing nothing,” we've heard that voice our whole lives.

Parents, caregivers, teachers, professors — the voice absorbs them all.

It has spoken so often, and in so many different ways, that its echo never fades.

The moment you pause, it barks: "Arbeiten! Schneller!"

Silence comes only rarely, during illness, sleep, or intoxication.

It seems the voice will finally shut up only when it concludes, "That's it, this one's."

Then it will move on to someone else and start drinking his blood.

It's clear this voice is driven by fear, not love.

But where does such paranoia, relentlessness, and cruelty come from?

The one speaking in that voice fears Nothingness more than anything else in the world.

He is convinced that Emptiness, Absence, and Pause are all symbols of Death.

He wants to Live so desperately that he avoids Non-Being in every form.

Yet the paradox is that Nothing always precedes Something.

The earth is so nourishing in spring because it rested through the winter.

On the surface, it looked lifeless, still, and empty.

Below, invisible work was underway — breaking down all the old forms.

Because of that contrast, the explosive growth of spring feels like a miracle.

Doing Nothing is colossal work.

No one sees it. No one values it. They only interrupt it with a shout: "Achtung!"

Tired of running in place? Want to begin a new cycle of life?

Learn to Regularly Do Nothing.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Yahoo or Houyhnhnm? /  by Alexander Lyadov

Jonathan Swift turned our expectations upside down.

In the fourth part of Gulliver's Travels, horses turn out to be intelligent, noble, and honest beings. Humans, on the other hand, are base, greedy, and cruel — driven purely by instinct.

The Houyhnhnms embody the finest equine qualities, as if evolution had brought them to perfection by taking a different path.

The Yahoos look just like us — but they have lost the potential of the human and degraded into slaves of their passions above all else.

Swift paints the animal's ascent and humanity's fall so vividly that one thing becomes clear: the question isn't how much you were given, but what you did with the gift.

If you pay attention, you'll notice how much animals can teach us. How joyful they are to see us. How tirelessly they invite us to play. How patient they are in illness. How readily they forgive, again and again.

You don't have to look far to see how low a human being can fall. Your social media feed overflows with examples every day. And if you're honest enough to look inside your own heart — that can be sobering too.

Let's take one more step and carry this thought further: inside each of us there is simultaneously the potential of the human and the potential of the beast.

Each has an ambivalent nature. When expressed, each can inspire awe or evoke fear. And if you stop demonizing your inner beast, it can give you something no one else in the world can.

A tree reaches for the sun without trying to sever its relationship with the soil.

Perhaps you too were created to become a bridge between heaven and earth.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Disappear to Create /  by Alexander Lyadov

For the work to come out well, the doer must disappear.

A catalyst speeds up a chemical reaction, yet takes no part in it.

The musician dissolves into the melody he plays.

The business therapist becomes pure listening.

The person is there — attention sharpened, body active — but he isn't there.

The Ego disappears.

It doesn't inflate itself with importance. It doesn't claim ownership.

The finger has one function only — to point at the moon.

When no one gets in the Process's way, it flows freely, generously, effortlessly.

Only in a state of "transparency" does a person become a true Creator.

A paradox.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Eyes Up /  by Alexander Lyadov

In a garden, a park, or a forest, it's a pleasure to look around. Whatever form nature takes, it's always beautiful. Or at least fascinating.

It's different with environments built by people. A cityscape can sometimes be charming, but far more often it's bleak.

Gray buildings. A cacophony of signs. Conflict in everything from the details to the architectural styles.

The ugliness of the world affects you whether you like it or not.

"When Beauty was denied there was depression," said architect and design theorist Christopher Alexander.

By the way, people living in cities are about ​30% more likely​ to suffer from depression than those living in rural areas. And antidepressant prescription rates are inversely proportional to ​the amount of greenery around​ where people live.

Of course. Human beings and their environment are connected like communicating vessels. Or, even more precisely, like a crystal and a supersaturated salt solution in a flask.

So when a wave of gloom hits you outside, there's a simple way out:

Look up. Be still. Really look.

A clear sky, fluffy clouds, or gathering storm clouds are always marvelous. The elements are different today than they were yesterday. In fact, they change every moment.

You only need to hold back your skeptical mind: "Yeah, what's there that I haven't seen already?" Devaluing and desecrating the world is easy. Sanctifying it... that's the hard part.

A general rule: when the horizontal weighs you down, the vertical will save you.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Life Wins /  by Alexander Lyadov

Nothing in the desert is superfluous — would you agree?

If it ever was, it burned up, evaporated, or died long ago.

You may find it unpleasant to even think about Emptiness as such. The associations that come up: boredom, lifelessness, stagnation, scorching heat.

And yet you can't say the desert has no life. Little — but some.

The unbearable conditions allow only the chosen few to exist.

Tumbleweeds, dung beetles, venomous snakes, and scorpions.

And of course, quartz. After all, the desert is an ocean of sand.

In other words, it is the union of opposites. An oxymoron. A paradox.

Yes, a viper is not as beautiful as an eagle, and a cactus doesn't smell like a rose.

But notice that an eagle and a rose require stable, favorable conditions, while a viper and a cactus survive on almost nothing.

Their thorns, venom, and attraction to waste are not signs of an easy life.

More precisely, desert creatures embody life in a "terrible" form.

Life in scarcity cannot be compared with life in abundance.

The right comparison is: life under deficit — or death.

The same applies to human pathology.

Everyone habitually sees in it a flaw, an ugliness, a danger. But few people are able to find in pathology a tiny triumph of being over non-being.

This applies directly to you — to your inner world.

Something about yourself almost certainly weighs on you, irritates you, repels you, or frightens you. That is the part of you that survived in spite of whatever tried to kill it.

And unlike a viper or a cactus, that part of you can transform into something magnificent and life-giving.

Try giving it your compassionate gaze more often.

If that's hard, look for those who can see life where no one else can.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

The Portal /  by Alexander Lyadov

Everyone is born into this world with an existential hole inside.

It feels like an acute lack. Emptiness. Vacuum. Abyss.

The Ugly Duckling trapped in the barnyard, except the fairy tale never ends.

So the years go by, and a person longs, struggles, and suffers.

Of course, a billion ways to fill the "hole" have already been invented.

Some even argue that our entire culture exists to decorate and disguise it.

Countless industries, from alcohol to gambling, promise to help.

But the greatest temptation is the lives of other people: celebrities, authorities, influencers, and supposedly more successful acquaintances.

It seems that someone else's life contains, in abundance, exactly what she or he lacks. So the answer must be to learn, imitate, and copy another person's life, hoping your own will finally become whole.

By now it's probably clear to you that something is off here.

The world's best copying machine will never produce authenticity.

Just like power, a BMW, or crack cocaine, another person will not fill your "hole."

Looking for the answer in people, let alone things, is futile.

It's time to stop looking down or around, and start looking up.

Then the Hole can become a Portal.

Instead of Thirst, a Fountain can emerge.

The Draft of Death can give way to the Water of Life.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Let It Save You /  by Alexander Lyadov

Sometimes it's worth looking back at all the defining moments in your life.

I don't know about you, but I see a clear pattern in mine:

In truly dangerous situations, it was the Body that saved me — not the Mind.

Either events unfolded at breathtaking speed, or the external pressure physically exhausted my intellect. But at the critical moment, instinct took over. Intuition. Gut feeling.. Call it whatever you want.

Guided by this sixth sense, my body made the optimal move.

I was little more than an observer. And only if I had time to notice.

What fascinates me is that it is always a pairing. On one side, the body, associated with wildness, roughness, simplicity, and dirt.

On the other, neither rationality nor irrationality, but something closer to meta-rationality: spiritual insight. Because the spontaneous action fits as perfectly as the final puzzle piece.

Figuratively speaking, a connection forms between heaven and earth. And I find myself somewhere in between. The mind disappears completely.

The experience is so strange that the risk of being misunderstood is high. The first impulse is to dismiss it, explain it away, or bury it under a blanket of words.

Don't.

May we continue to be saved by what we cannot explain.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

The Final Creation /  by Alexander Lyadov

"Everyone around is waiting for him to die," the woman said.

I froze in shock.

“His paintings will immediately go up in value,” she explained.

The conversation took place about 20 years ago during the Venice Biennale. At the time, I worked in the wealth management industry. Contemporary art was one of the few places where my clients' interests and mine overlapped.

She published an art magazine, knew the inner workings, and knew everyone involved — who created, who promoted, who sold, who bought. I listened with my mouth open as she walked me through the shadow side of collecting.

All that aesthetics, harmony, and beauty, it turned out, had a flip side.

At that moment, we were talking about a famous musician who also painted. Sadly, alcohol, drugs, age, and illness had accelerated his decline. He had only weeks, perhaps days, left.

And while, on the surface, crowds sipped prosecco and celebrated the vitality of the art filling the pavilions, deep below, a pack of sharks circled and fought over the creative body of a dying artist.

The race was to buy his work before the moment X. Every tactic was fair game. Money was lying on the floor, waiting for someone to pick it up. But not everyone knew the secret. And timing meant everything.

Back then, I was simply stunned by what I saw. Now I understand its meaning.

Not only a creator's life — even his death is generative.

He creates new value with his entire being. From beginning to end.

Everyone else can enjoy the fruits of his work, collect them, or resell them. They can also ignore them, criticize them, or even destroy them.

But there is one thing they cannot do: Create the way only he could.

That's why when it seems the creator is gone — he lives on among us.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

Trust Your Feet /  by Alexander Lyadov

Sometimes the future looks something like this photo.

The road ahead seems straight — no congestion, no obstacles.

Yet it's immediately clear that the journey won't be an easy one.

It's all about the context. Ahead lies rain, a thunderstorm, a cyclone.

Discomfort is guaranteed. There may even be a threat to life.

And yet it's impossible not to marvel at the magnificence of the elements.

What a contrast — the reliability of the earth and the unpredictability of the sky.

Even as they collide, each remains true to its own nature.

That's why, even in total darkness, your feet will find the way by touch.

However cold or frightened you are, the body can keep moving forward.

Then the weather will change, and the sun will wink through the clouds.

Nothing in this world lasts forever. Everything exhausts itself in the end.

You only need to remind yourself more often:

"I Am."

Then even at the heart of Chaos, you can find beauty worth marveling at.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.

What Is Holding You? /  by Alexander Lyadov

One of the barriers to change of any kind is the rut of the Mind.

It’s such a familiar way of perceiving your environment that you stop noticing it. Like the young fish who, when an older fish asked "So, how's the water today?", looked puzzled: "What water?"

You think, feel, and act only this way. Suggest shifting your perspective just a little, and the response is confusion: "What do you mean, differently? Isn't this obvious to everyone?" Then comes irritation, anger, and so on.

How do you create the perfect drama? Trap everyone in a circle. The vigilant prison guard and the escaping prisoner live inside the same mind.

The most dangerous prison has no concrete walls or steel bars. A man draws a line in the sand himself: “You can’t go any farther. Besides, I don’t even want to.”

This becomes visible during guided imagery sessions, where the design of the exercise places no limits on participants' imagination whatsoever.

And yet you suddenly hit what feels like a glass wall — unable to do something that others, or even everyone else, can do freely. Why?

The analysis that follows helps bring to light a pattern of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, the conditions that trigger it, and its hidden meaning. What now blocks you so painfully may once have saved you.

But to truly grasp an insight, you have to endure the discomfort of Nothingness. The transition only happens when you let go of the old vine to reach for the new one.

That means you need an environment where it's safe to be in that critical moment. Someone more experienced and mature holds the perimeter and takes care of you.

Then your chances of crossing the threshold of the River of Life safely become much higher.

Throughout history, Ritual helped people do exactly this.

Until modern man decided it was all nonsense and superstition.

And ever since, he’s been getting hopelessly stuck where nothing is actually holding him.

There’s nothing worse than blocking the flow of Being with your own body.

Why create and maintain Hell with your own hands?

There’s good news, too.

Turning a tragic situation around doesn’t require sacrifice or superhuman effort.

You can begin by accumulating experiences of “mad” being:

  • engaging creative work of any kind,

  • deep play,

  • genuine love,

  • a profound ordeal,

  • contemplating Beauty,

  • authentic prayer,

  • a living encounter with the Other,

  • voluntary uncertainty,

  • symbolic work (dreams, active imagination, guided imagery),

  • ritual.

​Sincerely yours,​

​-Alexander​

As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.

Stuck? Your business grows when you do. I’m your business therapist to guide your shift. See testimonials ​here​. Ready? ​Book your Catalyst session​.