Have you ever wondered why someone reacted so sharply to your seemingly so honest, reasonable, and neutral words?
Instead of gratitude, you see irritation, outrage, and hurt. “Strange, I was trying to be objective. What got into him?”
Fairy tales will give us the answer… More precisely, the dead water and the living water.
They have different functions. Dead water joins severed parts of the body, heals wounds, in short, prepares the body for life, but does nothing more. Scholars of fairy tales believe that dead water makes the character fully dead, completing his transition into death.
There is a Latin expression: “Hic locus est, ubi mors gaudet succurrere vitae,” which means: “This is the place where death rejoices to come to the aid of life.” Yet dead water cannot bring anyone back to life.
That function belongs specifically to living water. After the dead water, the character has become whole, but he is still dead. But sprinkle just a few drops of living water on his body, and he comes back to life.
Our words sometimes achieve the first goal: removing everything unnecessary and joining the parts back together. Is that valuable? Of course. But this is only the first phase, the one that dead water is meant to perform perfectly.
Take the second step: bring the clean and mended “body” back to life. You may be surprised by how little it takes, not an ocean, not even a bucket. In communicating with another person, just one drop of living water is enough.
Let him or her know that you see the person, and not only the wound (problem). A gram of tenderness. A micron of affection. A photon of warmth.
It may seem like a tiny thing, just one drop, but in fairy tales it is literally the difference between death and life. Believe it or not.
Sincerely yours,
-Alexander
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