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Recent sessions with founders, where we discovered new opportunities for growth in their businesses, brought to mind the phenomenon of closed doors. The bottom line is that any change, both tiny and tectonic, is ambivalent in nature. That is, with one hand it denies access to something familiar and dear. And with the other hand, it invites us somewhere else. But we, by inertia, look at the closed door and wait for something. And even if we can hear the sea breeze and the cries of seagulls coming from the door, which is open nearby, and, in short, we feel prosperity and freedom there, we keep pulling the old handle, tearing off the bell and banging our heads against the oak planks.
One reason for this clinging to the past is that the change happened not at our will, but against it, staggering us like a snake stung from an ambush. Perhaps the current status quo did not suit us, and we even dreamed of beginning to change things somehow. But not so radically, not so rapidly, and certainly not at such a high cost.
I remember how about 20 years ago in Odessa I decided to do a bungee jump. Standing on the edge of a construction crane site, I could see the wobbly crowns of the pine trees and my friends below, looking like ants. Taking the decisive step was insanely difficult. Suddenly the bungee workers yelled, “Three! Two! One! Go!” And I jumped, but formally, for I understood nothing. So the next day I went and jumped again. This time on my own. And I got the full range of impressions, which I will remember forever. Mechanically, there is no difference between the jumps. Even the individual is the same. But in the first case, my experience was confusion, regret, and emptiness. And in the second, a sense of flight, gratitude and elation.
Voluntarily accepting the inevitable is a paradoxical move to transform any minus into a plus. Because change happens all the time, rest assured that new doors are waiting for you.
Yours sincerely,
-Alexander
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”Who are you and what do you do?"
As a business therapist, I help tech founders quickly solve dilemmas at the intersection of business and personality, and boost company value as a result.
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